14th year house bound

Hi Anne

Thanks for the support I am going to have to break tasks into more manageable jobs. So easy to become overwhelmed.

Take care and thanks for the teddy

Karen

Hi Jacques

I'm so proud of you, what an achievement. The main thing to concentrate on is that you didn't pass out and you managed to help the electrician. Sending you a huge hug, I know you don't like hugs but you certainly deserve one after today!!!! You must be exhausted.

I spent another day at the house just cleaning I've now washed my hands so many times that my fingertips are raw. Some how I need to get this under control. Any tips Jacques on what helps you with your ocd I would appreciate. I became so distressed today I ended going outside and chopped a tree down. Good thing there are lots.

I'm exhausted and aching in places that I didn't know could hurt. Too much time in the car I've become so unfit.

J you are my hero what you have achieved is awesome

Take care hope your in your sleeping bag and hot water bottle, you've had a big day my friend. Be kind to yourself you deserve it.

Karen

Thank you @Appleblossom,

The sad fact @Appleblossom, their was no druggies in the house, we don't know where all the drug paraphanalia came from, but yes, i am still fixing up the damage 20 years on, it is a beautiful home, maybe crap to others, but it is our home, we love it and the scenery around it.

It is almost where we want it, mum wants to create a "haven" for us to be away from people.

Yes ignorance is bliss, until it goes wrong, we where so frightened to turn anything on for fear of burning the house down, it is so nice to turn on a light and have it work. it is going to take me quite a while to get used to going through the house with light, for so long we walked through the house in the pitch black. i can close my eyes and walk around the house without walking into a wall, i am so used to it.

Thank you @Appleblossom, i am sorry if i gave you the impression it was druggies, it was not, just horrible people who have no respect for other peoples things.

Jacques

i am a bit older and wiser @Jacques .. there can be horrible druggies and horrible doctors and good ones and in between.

I am just glad you are logical and hard-working at fixing your situation but also accepting it as it was.

I lived in squats without electricity as a kid and a teen .. it tended to make me not take anything for granted but also stressed and marginalised. I might have already told you that my grandfather figured out how to turn on electricity for his while row of tennement houses in Holland during the occupation and blackouts .. they were only discovered withpower and a radio in the last months and the billeted german soldiers ended up listening to BBC with my opa and made friends with family etc etc

We spent 10 years renovating. Some homes are so much more beautiful when renovated with love ... good on you. My current place was brand new and I planted things quickly and brought in old things from my old place to give it more character. It is a budget brick veneer without eaves. I was not up for a 2nd renovating experience with neck ... but its fine so am happy here.

It is so good that you can talk to @hiddenite from experience of both MH struggles and renovations. Take care.

Hi Karen,

Sounds like we both had a big day, i am so proud of you for not giving up, so many people would just cry, good to see you let out your frustration on the tree, sometimes it is good to let it out, so you can get back onto cleaning.

Karen from you i will accept a hug anytime, you are my best friend.

Karen i came so close to passing out, i was in the celing, i couldn't breath, my heart was pounding so hard it hurt.

Karen how i get around (sort of) my ocd wit hands, is some latex disposable gloves, powder free, you can buy them anywhere super market bunnings, etc, they usually sell them in packs of 100, i usually wear 2 on each hand, i still have to wash them but not as much.

I really sympothise with you KAren, OCD hand washing is so hard, if i touch my face, a wall, anything really i have the urge to wash my hands, they feel dirty.

Yes muscles are terrible, i have the same thing, my backside and legs are aching, and i dislocated my thumb in the first 10 min when i nearly passed out, i was falling and i streached out to stop myself and in the process popped my thumb out, it hurt putting it back in and is still sore.

We will both rest well tonight.

Yes i am in my slepping bag and hot water bottle now. i m so happy you are not letting it get the better of you. you are my inspiration, keep up the good work.

Jacques

J it's no wonder you nearly passed out you dislocated your thumb. I know it is so painful, my knee dislocates very easily, but boy is it painful. I'm in bed with the girls just waiting for them to go to bed. I need a rest.

I'm glad you accepted the hug, I also send you a virtual back RUB with your favorite essential oil.

Rest up J

My awesome friend

Sorry Karen, it was the other way round, i needed to sit from nealry passing out and lost my balance, i put my hand on the nearest beam and caught my thumb, it is aching so bad now, i am finding it hard to type.

Oh My friend you are too kind, Lavender for me i hope you manage rest, try the latex gloves tomorrow, it sometimes works for me.

Hang in their, you will gain more confidence and self esteem as you go, i know i did.

Jacques

Maybe I had to get tough stuff off my chest @PeppiPatty ... many of us have complicated stories.

I am really a bit of a softie ... a big marshmallow idealist ...but I also dont wont serious things dealt with glibly .. happened too often ... so I try to be a straight shooter ... more than a smoochie ... though one of my piano students said I was too nice ...another mum told me I had to boss more ... posting on the forum has helped me to write straight off the top of my head rather than worrying about being good, correct, academic, shame, what I look like, or what I should or should not say. its cleared out a lot of my overload, if that makes sense ...

Anyway I am always conscious of the thread "owners". I hope @Jacques is doing ok and revelling in electric POWER.

@Appleblossom, i am so glad you are keeping in touch, i love that you join in, the more the merrier i say, i like you and find your writing quite interesting, i don't have as much life experiance as you, and i find it quite mezmorising reading about your earlier life, and your families life, i fee lso honoured you are willing to share so much here on the forums, i am so glad you are breaking out and writing what ever comes to mind, not matter what others think, i wish their where more people like you in the world.

I like to see Anne and Arlo cut in when they choose to too, maybe the new computer is giving them some enjoyment

@Appleblossom, i don't feel like i own any thread, so anyone feel free to post, i think share and share alike.

Jacques