im back..... i think

Hi @outlander,

It sounds like you understandably have a few concerns about the recent discussion with your GP about HPV.

Sorry if you have already covered this, I haven't completely caught up on the thread, but what has your GP said about this?

Thank you for your love @outlander

We all have cancer cells. The Human body is made up of more than 50 trillion cells! those cells are constantly dividing and multiplying and as a result there will always be some cancer cells. Our bodies have the ability to get rid of them! Our immune system is one defense and another is our body's ability to resist blood vessels from growing into and feeding them. Your body is healing you, without you even knowing it. You can 'do' something while your waiting for the next test. You can eat healthily, do regular excercise, focus on sleeping well and think positive. Thinking positively is a very strong medicine - it helps your body heal in every way.

I don't blame you for being scared, I absolutely understand.

In fighting your fear you will fight all of the bad within you and without.

Maybe you could visualize the bad as a darkness and the good as light. Everytime you eat something healthy, sleep, excercise, smile, laugh, help someone, do good, your light will shine brighter and the darkness will fade.

You can 'do' something while your waiting for the next test. You can eat healthily, do regular excercise, focus on sleeping well and think positive. Thinking positively is a very strong medicine - it helps your body heal in every way. -- I agree with @Former-Member

@outlander, sending you a knowing hug my friend

When the Kidney specialist told me I Had Kidney disease and I am heading to go on a dialalis one day and it scared me too

Everytime you eat something healthy, sleep, excercise, smile, laugh, help someone, do good, your light will shine brighter and the darkness will fade.

i always try to do the right thing @Shaz51@Former-Member

and look where it keeps taking me at this rate im going to get worse

its constantly one thing after another after another.

what have i dont to deserve all this?

what else can i do to make amends with anything or everything to make this stop!

its freaking scary stuff and i dont know what to do about it and i feel to alone and helpless and upset and confused and angry at myself and the eprson who gave it to me and a whoole range of emotions but the one that stands out if fear. complete fear!

@outlander I know that experiencing these difficult things in life is incredibly hard and can make us question what we have done to deserve this...but these sorts of things aren't punishment for something that you've done, there is nothing you could have done to deserve this.

Feeling like its just one thing after another is so hard and makes you question "when am I going to catch a break". I think the important thing in this is not how many things have been thrown your direction, but the resilience you show in being able to pick yourself up again despite the hardship. This is a true strength of character, even if it doesn't feel this way right now.

The possibility for the HPV to either resolve itself or not is a scary thing to happen and be faced with. The positive thing is that it can resolve and in many cases it does exactly that. While you are waiting it is important for you to remind yourself that this is still early stages. I understand that it is scary and a range of other emotions as well, but you will make it through this.

Just try your best to monitor your thinking patterns in the meantime and continue doing all those things that keep you healthy as @Shaz51 mentioned. These things can really help for both your physical and mental health