im back..... i think

I know you understand @Owlunar your absolutley amazing- im out of words but know I care about you and I love you to the bone seriously. yove bee with me through some of the hardest things in my life and i appreciate it so much

im just hoping the stabbing pains done come back.
My back hurts which I know is from stress this time its a stress kind of pain and this nausea is really shocking. It wakes me up and prevents me from sleeping so I hope that eases too.
And thats a side effect since im such a high dose of anti depressents- like really high

and do you know what the breast lump looks like it could be coming back. It looks like the blood is starting to build back up which is how it started last ime

I know you understand just by reading your responses and its like I can feel you through your responses -i dont know if you can feel me through my responses or not but I know your there.
Your experinces as bad as they are do sort of comfort me in the fact that you know the feeling and how it does feel to be going through this

yes these people are getting worse and im about ready to stop using words and start using fists casue ive honselt yhad enough and I dont need their crap anymore. Im dealing with too much already
and guess what my mum approached her boss which is also my ex freidn(one of th bullies ) mum and her response was they are adults they can work it out themselves
my mother said alright but I would want to be them is (my name) snaps. So in a way I guess shes sticking up for me this way but not supportive any other way

and yes its very much what appintment is next- 150 already in 6 months is really scarey an ive still got my blood test to do with is fasting
but I might get some numbin cream tomorrow and get it over and done wth tomorrow

and please take care of you as well, ive been readin your comments and thread including more than this one and i want to be there and give you a big hug as well- i want to reach through and hug you so bad

and to 'feel' your hug and comfort would be amazing

i dont know whats worying me so much @Former-Member ive never been in this situation

i dont know what to ask my nurse though if you have any that i should ask that would help me

its like i have heaps of questions but its all jumbled and nothing is making sense except for complete fear

and yes i defienelty see your point of expsoure thats one question i know ill be asking about tomorrow if its not necessary then i wont be doing it

@Former-Member have you found something that makes you smile?

this ones for you too @Owlunar@Faith-and-Hope@Shaz51@soul@Former-Member @Phoenix_Rising and everyone else

Good night @outlander, I wish you sleep, calmness and peace I may not be able to tell the furture, I may not be able to cure your ills, but I can care and I can be your friend, and be grateful that you accept these things from me

Hi @outlander

Sorry to read that you are anxious about a medical appointment tomorrow, and can't seem to get the fearful thoughts out of your mind. It's understandable however worrying is not going to change whatever news you receive tomorrow, nor will it have you well rested and better able to cope.

I guess the main strategies are trying to put it out of your mind by distracting yourself with a book, TV, radio etc. Something light and enjoyable. Try having a shower to warm up and relax muscles ready for sleep. Have a warm, milky drink.

See if you can sleep a bit. Take care and best wishes for tomorrow.

Frog