Safety

Hi @Eden1919 Checking in to see how you are today

Hi @Zoe7 I hope you are ok. I am not great today I am exhausted and sad and I really dont know what to do anymore the thoughts are also getting a lot stronger even entering into my dreams now. I am still trying though but for how much longer that will last I dont know.

I'm ok @Eden1919 still here, still getting by minute by minute!

I am so pleased to hear you are still trying - that is half the battle buddy

Courage, strength, belief - you got this

Hi @Eden1919,

You've shown a lot of strength. I'm impressed with how much you're giving things a go. I know that it doesn't feel like much, but it is something. Remember, fake it unitl you make. Distract so yourself so you're not focused on the bad things, and if things get too much, contact emergency services.

We're here with you.

What have you been up to today?

@Zoe7 I am glad you are ok. @CherryBomb I just went for a walk and am listneing to music now. I might do some painting maybe later if i have time. other than that i havent done much. the thoughts are still very strong atm but i am trying everything i can because i really cant go to hospital again i cant. i am super exhausted though but i am also sleeping terribly so that is probably it. I feel like crying but also not it is very weird I am supposed to see my GP and Pyschiatrist soon too so I will see if that helps. I doubt it will but i will see. I feel very hopeless today overall. like no matter what i do i am always failing and I cant seem to fix things maybe that isnt even possible idk either way I am just really struggling.

@Eden1919 Struggling is my middle name - Zoe Struggling 7 (lol) - so welcome to the club

I need to go out for a little while but will check in on you when I return. Hang in there buddy - minute by minute, hour by hour. You can do this

@Eden1919 lack of sleep will definitely make anyone feel exhausted, both physically and psychologically. Go easy with yourself. Don't expect much of yourself. Getting by is enough. Be proud of that.

When are you seeing your GP and psychiatrist? I wonder if it would help jotting down your feelings? Like a list of things that are concerning you to give them.

Remember, that feeling helpless does not define who you are - it could be more a symptom of your MI flaring up. So it's important to let your treating team know what's going on.

What corner of Australia are you in? I'm out in the Blue Mountains, and it was stunning today. It would have been nice getting out in the sun of you're near Sydney.

@CherryBomb I could write a list maybe. I see them both in 2 days so i am kind of nervous. I am just really struggling with the thoughts atm like i cant get them out of my head and even when i try to sit with them that makes it worse because i end up making plans and then doing things towards those plans and then i have to stop myself which is really really hard. i dont even know what to do anymore.

That sounds really concnering @Eden1919

I'm going to email you, can you get back to me?

@Eden1919 Hi buddy. I can see that you are doing it really tough again tonight. It really sucks for you that it is so hard - I don't have any advice for you as you know I am still struggling also but I wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and remind you of our three little words - strength, courage, belief - you have them all inside you - I know you can find them - you have done it so many times before and you can do it again - I believe in you and can see your strength and courage every day even through your struggles.

Zoe