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I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.
In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.
Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.
I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.
Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.
@Zoe7 that is so so so much exactly how I would love a rainbow path to look and be 😍! Love it, thank you.
I watched the sunrise this morning and was thinking of some forum people, including you. It was the most stunning deep pink. It looked like the sky was on fire this morning. 💛
In response to: Re: I'm in a nest
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
I am glad you like the decorations @CheerBear
You need to get some photos of those sunrises CB and post them on Far and Away to add into all our other sunrise and sunsets - I 'visit' that thread when I need some light in my day - and seeing you and your images there would add just that little more
In response to: I'm in a nest
Unknown userMember
Re: I'm in a nest
Thanks @Zoe7💜💕@CheerBear💟💕
Couldn't sleep, but I don't want to get out Iif my snuggly bed. Guess I'll have to. I still have so much washing to catch up on. Couldn't do much while nursing puddy tat. 🐱😢 Non stop rain here. I'm thankful for a clothes dryer. Must be coffee time. Super strong one. I still feel so sad and teary. I loved my baby kitty cat. 😢💜🐱
Nice to be here with you. 💕 Helos me not feel so alone. ☕🍰
In response to: Re: I'm in a nest
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
Hi @Former-Member I only pop in and out of the nest when I can walk the rainbow path - which isn't often. I am presuming that you have lost your kitty cat - that is so so sad Bella I wouldn't want to get up or do anything much myself. The washing can wait - coffee and something nice just for yourself this morning.
In response to: I'm in a nest
Unknown userMember
Re: I'm in a nest
Thanks @Zoe7 It was a traumatic 3 weeks. Devastating. 😢💜💕💟🌷🌺🌹🌼🌸🌻 I guess I'll have to get up out of my snuggly bed now. I really feel like a coffee. One for you too. 😙☕🍰🍵🍩 or tea 😊
In response to: Re: I'm in a nest
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
I don't drink coffee but a nice honey and lemon tea might help soothe my throat a little @Former-Member
In response to: I'm in a nest
CheerBearSenior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
I'm here having a cup of coffee at the moment, after my appointment with my mh worker.
@Former-Member - drinking tea and coffee with you helps me feel less alone too. I really love that I can eat do much cake here as well, and not need to think about where on my body it will end up 😛 I'm so sorry about puddy 😞 It is so sad, and especially to think of her being like your second baby.
@Zoe7 - I haven't really visited far and away much, so I'll make a point of popping over more often. I 'see' the lovely @Faith-and-Hope coming past here lots and appreciate it always. I also appreciate it whenever you're able to walk the rainbow path and always enjoy bumping into you when I do.
I'm off to a place that feels like Disney. Spotlight 😉 I have a special trip planned there tomorrow with my next closest to Disney (Bunnings) so this is like a research trip (and more kind of just a nice thing to get me out of the house seeing as there's a lot of not-so-nice things happening at the moment). My plan is to do what I can re housing, use my weekly mh worker appointments for debrief about the past week and planning for the week ahead, and lots of self-care stuff while this goes down. She's going to be like my floaties if I need them while I am stuck in this whirlpool, and like my tug boat to help me out if I sink too far down. She's also going to step in if needed with any housing stuff that should be happening but isn't, if that happens. @Phoenix_Rising - she said what you said the other day about how cool it is to have forumland be in my pocket even during times where I don't know where I'll be or where I am. There's no point in attempting to connect with others in the non-virtual ocean when I don't even know what ocean I'll be living in. So I guess you're all stuck with me for a while 😛
More positive today than yesterday. The sun is shining here which helps too. Check back in later. Have a good day nesters and nest visitors 🙂
In response to: Re: I'm in a nest
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
@CheerBear My disneyland is the other way around - Bunnings first then spotlight lol and I have been know to 'get lost' in Ishka at times too!!!!
In response to: I'm in a nest
Unknown userMember
Re: I'm in a nest
Honey and lemon tea for you @Zoe7🍵💜
Enjoy Spotlight and Bunnings @CheerBear💟☕
Clothes/shoe shopping is more my thing. 😂 👕👖👗👠👡👞👟👑👒 Lately - no shopping is my thing. 😂 Trouble is we run out of food. 😮😣
I managed to get 2 loads of washing done. Paid bill, did internet "stuff" that I prefer not to do. Funny how a simple thing you've always done a certain way changes on internet, eg, they ask you to change a password, but won't let you do it. Oh my gosh! I need a cuppa. I need a med. 😂 Trying not to today though . They make me feel so tired. See how I go, maybe half or quarter????? 😂
In response to: Re: I'm in a nest
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Re: I'm in a nest
Thanks for my tea @Former-Member I am impressed that you got 2 loads of washing done - which reminds me - I better get mine out of the machine lol
The stupid internet changes that are supposed to make life easier do often make it even harder - and then you have to remember a new pin number or password - I can't keep up either - and I'm a bit of a 'techno head' - maybe it comes with getting older - or the fact that I don't do change well lol
Grab another cuppa and see how you feel after that Bella
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