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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Sorry (and trying to rewind myself to listen to my own words about sorries).

Thanks for being you bookish. I hope those buses turn around really, big time soon, for you and for all of us who spend way too much heart and head space trying to recover from them.

Floating @Former-Member. Night 💚

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Not a chicken at all, @CheerBear. Avoiding extra whirlpoolishness (regardless of how it is whipped up) can only be a good thing. (Plus you're talking to someone who is literally terrified of everything right now.)

Thank you for making the world a better place, CB. Night. 💚

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Morning nest

@Former-Member I hope today is not as really bad as yesterday and that there's something in your day that does nice things for your insides.

I think it's really brave to be terrified of everything and still be keeping on keeping on (no matter how wonkily or shakily).

Thinking of you

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hello @CheerBear @Former-Member thinking of you both this morning. I hope the struggles ease today. Wishing you at least a little peace.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Morning and thank you @frog (we were cross posting I think).

Sending you similar wishes. Hoping you're going ok enough ❤

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Morning nest. Morning @CheerBear and @frog, and thank you both for your kind morning words.

I hope today is gentle and kind to all. 🌷

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@frog @CheerBear @Former-Member Buses should be banned. We will create a bus-free world. We are already doing step 1: Staying alive. We've got this.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Yep - we got this

👍☺

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear

Thinking of you, wishing there really was something I could actually do to help.

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