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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

We had to tell her friends,so they are aware to call ambulance if necessary.
Hope you don’t mind me writing here
I’ve been feeling lost on the forums for a long time.
I don’t want to start a thread. I like my posts to be hidden. So it’s more anonymous, if that makes sense? 🙂
I guess I better see if there’s anything thing for lunch.
Are you having a home day today?

School starts next week here. I’m SO SO glad D has finished. At least high school stress is over

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear. Above msg. 🙂

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

It's good that her friends know so they're aware of what to do if something happens @Former-Member. D sounds really responsible and from what I remember, her friends are pretty responsible also?

I don't mind you or anyone writing here. It's really good to see you around wherever feels right for you (or right enough) when it does. Totally understand how having parts of stories scattered about can help with the anonymity thing also.

Home day. It's over 40 here today and it was a long sleepless night (for myself and the littlest who was up and down all night). The kids are happy having turned the lounge room into a giant bed/beanbag room. They've got drawing stuff, movies, games, devices (too many of them) and it's cool inside.

High school stress sounds scary. Not looking forward to that :S

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

On phone to hospital
Catch you another time. @CheerBear. 💜

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

...a very quick fly over the rainbow path to the nest to drop these off for @CheerBear and @Former-Member ...

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Thankyou @Zoe7. 💜❤️💕🌺🌷🌹
Just what I need. Now I’ll make a cuppa
Having such an awful time phoning hospitals doctors neurosurgeon etc etc etc.
people don’t know what they’re doing
Let me off this planet 🌍
No need to reply
Just saying 😳😪😢

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I saw the dolphins yesterday @Former-Member ..... 🐬💕

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

😘💜❤️🐬. @Faith-and-Hope. 👍
Everyone is making this so much harder
I’ve spent so much time on the phone sorting things
It shouldn’t be so hard
Even receptionist said that
It’s stressful enough re D
I’m not cut out for life on earth
Is there another planet to go to?

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Yeah @Former-Member ..... stay in this corner of Forumland as much as you need to Hon. We are here for you .....

💐💜💕🌷🐬☔️🎈☕️💚

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Here are a variety of hot beverages for you to choose from @Former-Member - to go with your cupcake :heart I'm sure you would not mind sharing with @CheerBear and @Faith-and-Hope

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