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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear, it sounds like you need this.

There is a strong probably that tomorrow will be a better day, and that is only 3.5 hours away...as opposed to if we lived on Venus, in which case it would be 5811.5 hours away. Yay for not living on Venus!!!! I hope you have a super peaceful night's sleep my melted snowflakey banana headed energizer bunny not-friend.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear 🦄 🌷

@Phoenix_Rising 🌷 🐢

I wish I had a wand or a genie or something. 🙁

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Me too. @Former-Member

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I was writing that post almost hearing the "well that was obvious - glad you finally saw it too" except I trusted that a not-friend and some safe nest company people respect banana heads enough to get how this stuff can happen.

Haha with that button @Phoenix_Rising! I may have said something about not exactly loving pause buttons today 😛 But they are important. Thank you for helping me feel less horrible today and giving me a laugh. And for being my not-friend even though I am a snowflakey banana headed energizer bunny with a pause problem.

@Former-Member - I so wish I had both of those things too. If I had them I would share them with you. I hope you're ok enough, though imagining maybe things are not so great for you. Please say hi to Edie-Cat from Noodle and Mouse.

I'm heading off for the night. Yay for not living on Venus, for having a brain that does unmash itself eventually (with some gentle encouragement), and for a low tolerance to medication which means it is almost certain sleep will happen soon.

Night nest. Thanks for giving me a safe place to be me.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

good night @CheerBear, @Phoenix_Rising, @Former-Member, @Former-Member, @Faith-and-Hope

what is a good button @CheerBear, @Phoenix_Rising for " whole on world -- Stop for a minute " soo I can get myself back on track xx

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@Shaz51 I think this is what you are looking for.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest


@CheerBear wrote:

Haha with that button @Phoenix_Rising! I may have said something about not exactly loving pause buttons today 😛 But they are important. Thank you for helping me feel less horrible today and giving me a laugh. And for being my not-friend even though I am a snowflakey banana headed energizer bunny with a pause problem.


Pssssst @Former-Member, It seems that CheerBear is a bunny with a paws problem.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hehehe. Thank you for that laugh, @Phoenix_Rising, I really needed it. 😁

(Your language twists really are top notch.) 😊 🐢

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hi @CheerBear

I just read your post now. I am so sorry to read of your present struggle today. Sleep problems can really throw a spanner in the works - I have been struggling that way myself. And it can leave us feeling flat and overwhelmed the following day. With myself personally constant worry and/or not being able to switch my mind off (burnout) can lead to this.

You have had a lot of major life changes lately and that can take some adjusting to. You deserve a break my friend - you have been through a lot for a long while. I hope you get a good night sleep without the nightmares tonight and wake up to a brand new day feeling refreshed with renewed hope. Thinking of you. Sweet dreams 💕xx

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

@CheerBear My clock has just hit midnight, morning has arrived. Reading through some of your journey and that inner critic is a busy bee these days, been in my head now for weeks, had a slight break today and making the most of it.

So good to read you are going to give you a break and if you are up to it , a pic of where the blanket is up to would be good. Melting here in tassie, hottest November ever and the locals are not happy campers.

Sleep well, hoping sweet dreams not nightmares. Warm thoughts.🙃🙃💟

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