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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

ahhh sending you hugs my friend @Former-Member

Mr shaz is playing yoyo with his meds at the moment @Former-Member

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I’m sorry to hear that, @Shaz51.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

thanks @Former-Member, he keeps on cutting his meds back

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Hi @CheerBear Just deleting info that I don't want to be public.

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Oh @Former-Member 😞 That is so so SO much. I don't know what to say except I am big time feeling at the moment thinking about how hard that all would be for you. My heart hurts to think of you having that experience with D, and I think I would feel very much the same about schoolies too. I read you were worried about schoolies even before this happened.

Is she able to finish up the year with exams? Far out 😞

I really truly do understand that you have had other things to think about at the moment. It can be hard to keep up here without lots happening in not-forumland life. You can tag me wherever Bella. I won't always be able to reply (as I know you understand too), but I do always care. I don't mind where or when, it's nice to hear from you when we do.

I wish I could come with dinner made for you, and chocolate and ice cream.

😞 Big love Bella. Thank you for checking in and letting us know how you're going

Ps I love IKEA and Kmart has some great things, I agree. Like sloths 😉

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Haven’t seen you for a while @Former-Member ...... ♥️

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Chocolate and ice cream sounds yum @CheerBear ☕🍰

💜

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Pancake dinner is my go-to sometimes @Former-Member 🙂 Yours sounds healthier than ours though!

Go D - that is so awesome!!! Your D has finished school Bella!

I look at mine and wonder how I am ever going to let them out into the big world of things like schoolies sometimes! My puffer fish is having their first ever not-family sleepover this week. That's hard enough. Schoolies sounds scary, but a milestone maybe you both have to go through even though it's really hard (and understandably so!).

I am feeling good today thanks. The answer to that question would have been very different yesterday though I am really hoping that having this house stuff over in this way, will make a big difference.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

It's a big deal for you both @Former-Member - all of it!

Hope that shower feels good

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