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Something’s not right

I'm in a nest

I'm in a nest

I'm making a nest because I'm not feeling very ok and I would like to have a place to retreat to while I ride it out. Everything is chaotic all around and inside me almost all of the time, and I need some time out from it. If I make a nest here I can carry it in my pocket and know it's there for me.

In this nest it's very cosy. There's lots of soft pillows and blankets. Some are made with bright colours, mostly greens, pinks and yellows, and some are made in much deeper shades of purples. The nest is egg shaped so it can be climbed into it but still be a hiding out place. There's lots of fairy lights strung around the nest. They're different shapes and some are warm yellow, some are cool white and some are multi-coloured. They can be adjusted to vary the amount and type of light inside. There's also music which can sometimes be heard throughout the whole nest and sometimes it's playing from the headphones that are always kept on the pile of cushions. There's a lava lamp as well, and squishy glitter balls to squeeze and roll in hands. There are an endless supply of soft creatures to hold or sit with. There's always flowers in the corner and this morning they are gerberas standing tall and proud, on a little wooden table. Next to the vase is a teapot, colourful and quirky, with a collection of teacups and mugs.

Right now I am sitting in a pile of cushions very still with my knees to my chest, my head on my knees and my arms wrapped around my legs. There's no music at the moment so it is very quiet. Only a couple of strings of lights are turned on and they're twinkling yellow balls, so it's very dark but there's still some light inside. I have a soft blanket around me. It's peaceful in here.

I have to sit here until I can work out what to do next. I'm surrounded by people but I don't remember feeling so alone. I feel scared of making any move right now because I don't know what the right move is, and I don't trust any direction. I'm hoping that if I can hold out like this for just a little bit longer I will know what to do.

Right now I don't want to talk but I don't want to feel so alone either, so I'm asking for someone to please come and sit quietly next to me until I can move from my ball or I am made to move from it. I don't know when that will be, but I know I can't stay like this forever.

5090 replies

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In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Was given a chemo type cream (prescription) @CheerBear
Apparently it prevents cancers from growing. Doc recommend I apply it to my chest, as I have alot of sun damage and have had lots of skin cancers.
I think I apply it every day for 6 weeks. Skin gets very red, then blisters. 😮😣😨
Lucky I can hide it with a shirt, but might need to do my face also. Gosh! Need to do some research.
I guess it's better than having them surgically removed.
Been everywhere this afternoon.
Trying to get off couch, into shower and bed.
Was your day ok?

Hi to everyone around. 👋💟

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

If only I knew that sunbaking would do this. @CheerBear
Never heard of it when I was young.
I loved sunbaking in the middle of the day with babyoil or coconut oil, until I burnt myself.
Used to blister sometimes. Gosh! How silly.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I was just about to swing past the nest to ask how you got on @Former-Member. Wow 😞 While it sounds like a better option than having them surgically removed, that seems scary. Bug hugs for you.

My day was wonky but better than yesterday thanks. I am feeling pretty snowflakey at the moment. Had a big spill to my mh worker about how painful I am finding this whole journey and a big debrief about yesterday's really tough stuff. I guess it helps. I wish I could just fix it all though 😕

Hopefully early night and good sleep for us tonight

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

sending you hugs @Former-Member, my 2 SIL did that cream tooo

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Good you had someone to talk to @CheerBear
Yes, early night sounds like a very good idea.

I tried another cream years ago. It made me very ill. But I'll do some research first. This one is different. Sounds yucky, blisters 😮😣😨
I saw a lady who had treated her face with it. 😨
Oh well. 😊
We all have "stuff" to deal with. 💟

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Oh hello @Shaz51 😀 you're here now. 💜
Hugs to you too. 😙

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

I am my friend @Former-Member, but not for too long xx

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Me either @Shaz51
I will get up of couch now and get ready for bed.
Nighty night to you, if you're going off here Shaz.💗💟
I might come back when I'm in bed. 😊

In response to: Re: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Good evening nest dwellers,

For some reason, I am soooooooo sleepy, so this is a quick flyby.

@CheerBear I didn't have any particular adventure today, but my early start was testament to how much better I'm feeling. I am naturally a morning person. As it turns out, I got up, got some things done, and then fell back into bed. And now I'm ready for bed again. I find being tired all the time super frustrating! I'm glad today was a little less wonky than yesterday, and that you were able to have a big vent to your MH worker. It shouldn't be this hard @CheerBear...and I don't care who wants to carry on about using "should/shouldn't"!

@Former-Member I have been having warm lemon drinks with honey in them to help with my cold. I super hope you feel better soon.

Hi @Mazarita and @Shaz51, I hope to see you over at the yoga thread sometime.

Alright, this little turtle is fading fast. Night nest dwellers.

In response to: I'm in a nest

Re: I'm in a nest

Nighty night @Phoenix_Rising 😴💜
Sleep well
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