Borderline Personality Disorder tips for family and friends

1. Read as much as you can about BPD — knowing about the disorder helps you deal with it.
2. Understand that BPD behaviors aren’t about you. Try to depersonalize what’s happening.
3. Collaboration for change. Accept that families can help, can learn effective skills and become therapeutic partners. They can reinforce treatment.
4. Be realistic. You will not eliminate another person’s borderline behavior, no matter how well you communicate. Only that person can do that. Your goal is simply to communicate in a way that respects you and the personal with borderline personality disorder. Click for more tips on communicating with someone with BPD.
5. maintaining other sustaining life roles such as friendships, leisure activities and work.
6. Maintaining good health, emotional and spiritual well-being.
7. Don’t invalidate their emotions. Everyone experiences emotions, and people with BPD experience them in spades – that is the very nature of emotional dysregulation. When a loved one of a person with BPD invalidates the emotions of someone with BPD, the result is shame and mistrust in expressing their emotions.
8. If you live with someone who has BPD, join a support group or consider therapy for yourself to help you deal with the issues you face.
9. Even if you understand BPD behaviors, you need to know your own limits and stick by them — don’t ever allow yourself to be abused.
10. Realize that sometimes the only thing you can do is leave the relationship when your loved one repeatedly runs over your limits or when your loved one refuses treatment.

Sources:

Sources:

Tips for Friends and Family of Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder

Spectrum BPD pamphlet

Helping Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder