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Major depression & social anxiety have been ruling my life and I feel so stuck. Lack of motivation, emotional overeating, loneliness..(my partner works nights and sleeps during the day, i have no friends & my family are either away or busy and I feel like I don't want to bother them) feelings of being worthless and hopeless, racing thoughts... I'm tired. And sad. No medication is helping and I have a support team around me (psychologist, psychiatrist, gp, mental health support worker) but I can't help but think why bother. Ive been holding on for so long and it doesn't seem to be getting better. I feel like there's only so much distracting I can do. Sorry, you probably don't want to read my depressing s*&t but thanks if you do.
@STORMGRL101, sorry youre unwell, things declined and you'te in hospital 😞 i'm glad thete was a bed available for you - you really need this support atm.
A lot of us have been there, Its happened to me - lost the plot - emergency service fuss (that in itself is hard to get over let alone what gets us into such a state). Services do it all the time so forget that, we all want you safe and at peace and getting the right support, to eventually stand on your own again.
Make the most of your stay in hodpital. Plan to stay as long as you can and nevet go back. Maybe write things down and read them out to yourself first to start with. But there's nothing wrong with silence for a while.
I found in hospital I learned routine again, ate better (eventually) and started talking with fellow patients first. We had group in the morning which was low key but good.
You're probably in high care assessment phase which is restrictive. Try to rest, youre safe there - now and then take x10 slow breaths, wriggle your toes and walk around. Its good youre able to chat with us. Keep reaching out. Thinking of you 🌷💕
In response to: Re: sad&stuck
STORMGRL101Senior Contributor
Re: sad&stuck
@Former-Member@CherryBomb@Faith-and-Hope Thank you 💕❤
yesterday was a highly distressing day. There was talk of sending me home and I just lost the plot. I said since when does the hospital send a severely suicidal person home. I wrote notes to the nurses and it was awful. Thankfully the dr listened to me and and I am still here and awaiting approval for a bed at a "break" place, a place between hospital and home. Don't know how long this will take. Could be tomorrow ,could be end of the week. Today has been a bit calmer and I managed to get up, shower, and do a bit of drawing.
In response to: Re: sad&stuck
CherryBombSenior Contributor
Re: sad&stuck
Hi @STORMGRL101,
Thanks for keeping in touch, I've been wondering about how you are. Good on you for standing your ground and advocating for your needs. It takes guts to do this, and I'm glad the doc listened to you. Though it sounds like it was really distressing for you to get to this point, it's good to hear that you are going to get the much needed respite.
It also makes me happy to hear that things are calmer today, and that you've managed to get showered and even do some drawing - that is awesome! What did you draw?
In response to: Re: sad&stuck
STORMGRL101Senior Contributor
Re: sad&stuck
@CherryBomb I finally feel listened to and it's a big relief. I think I will sleep better tonight. I came up with a tattoo I'd like to get, a lotus flower with the semi colon underneath. I then drew some Pokemon characters which I might upload.
In response to: Re: sad&stuck
Shaz51Senior Contributor
Re: sad&stuck
hello @STORMGRL101 , keep in touch my friend xx
I finally feel listened to , it is good to be listened too , we are here for you
In response to: Re: sad&stuck
Unknown userMember
Re: sad&stuck
@STORMGRL101, how aweful that they want to push you out so soon when you're feeling so vulnerable and at risk. Unfortunately it happens far to often. Sometimes they worry we'll become emotionally dependent on being there and guess that's hard to measure - good on you for sticking up for yourself! We need more MH beds. I'm glad they are looking at a halfway place for you till you find your feet, and confidence. The only thing that helped me deal with pounding suicidal thoughts was time and stress reduction and facing the false beliefs within. We need help to do this but so few seem to have the skill or time to take us there. Keep journalling, that seems to be helping - well done! Thanks for letting us know how you are - we have concern for you and will help where we can. Your recovery will take time but i sense you have it in you, be kind to yourself. Hugz 💜💕
In response to: Re: sad&stuck
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
Re: sad&stuck
@STORMGRL101 ..... 💐
In response to: Re: sad&stuck
STORMGRL101Senior Contributor
Re: sad&stuck
Hi @Faith-and-Hope@Former-Member@Shaz51@CherryBomb❣️ Just a quick post to say thanks for your messages. I have been on an emotional roller coaster today. first being told I was going home then next minute I'm crying my eyes out in the bathroom when the nurse and dr opened the door to tell me the "break" place had a bed for me this afternoon even though earlier I was told there were at least 15 people on the waiting list before me! So I'm at the break place now and still feeling emotional but I hope this week will be enough for the storm to calm a bit in my head. Goodnight 🌷
In response to: sad&stuck
Unknown userMember
Re: sad&stuck
That's great @STORMGRL101, I hope they have an intense recovery programme for you and a good followup in place for when you do ho home. You can do this, make a new skills new start. Steady on forward. You're worth it 🙂
In response to: sad&stuck
STORMGRL101Senior Contributor
Re: sad&stuck
Today I have been to the therapy group. I saw the hospital report which says I have Dependent Personality Disorder. No one has ever talked to me about this. Feeling sad 😓
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What did you draw? 
