living with DID/ Dissociative Identity Disorder

@Former-Member Thank you, I will try that. It is awful, really awful. I hate DID, stamps a foot. Lol. 🐤🐤🐦🐦🐧🐔

Hi

its b een a while but was wonder if this site and forum is still going

Sure is @sketa Good to see you.

Hey @sketa

I'm one of the moderators, I'll definitely echo @Maggie to say we are still going as a peer support forum. Good to see you

I think most of the others who have responded here have moved on. I just wish there was someone who understood this complicated and twisted story. It’s a worse feeling than alone, but I don’t know how else to describe it. I get it that no one can get it, but that’s of no help at all. CPTSD being part of the package adds another layer to the complications. Having read an article today while looking for a DID support site, all the psychologist had to say was, it possible doesn’t exist, plus a whole lot of archaic thinking. Sad to know they are still out there, judging and degrading, in ignorance.

Also something else I read said “ Loneliness and feeling unwanted is the worst kind of poverty” Yep, I know that well. I hoped to find someone with a small degree of understanding, I know each journey has its alone times. I guess I’m lost again, with no signpost or path ahead of me, no map, just nothing, and I’m tired of being tired, and lost and alone. I just wish someone on the planet could get this, I really do. But I understand how hard it is to get it, and I’m on the inside.

As a long term person with did or as i call it dpd in my case we get to know each other gradually. I have alters/others and they are not all fully functional or news. Some are soldiers there to deal with fights or difficult situations others may just serve a function such as the party person, the driver, librarian, 2nd parent and many more. Can't say i know them all but sometimes they leave impressions to let you know. I have lost count of how many there are but i know they range from children, teens, women of many ages as well as males from teen to senior years. I have come to call them the community and sometimes they chat to each other and ones who are present. I am not the original personality but i am the current main so hey every day is an adventure who knows what the future holds.

Hi @LadyCaroline welcome to the forums. I saw you in another thread also.

Yey to the adventure part. A roller coaster of a ride we all have. I call mine my jig saw family. We range in age and male female also.

Do you have a psych/counsellor..?.

I saw you completed nursing, well done. I did also, though I did it a long time ago. Very few DID around, but very understanding and caring people around the forums. You are welcome to join any conversation. There are lighter chatty threads if you would like a tag, or just go at your own pace. Take care.

@Maggie Thanks I will gradually find my way around the forum. My last symptom break out left me really debilitated and not able to function at all. Tech became an issue whew it was bad. I am also a carer and that takes its tole too. Thankfully some holiday time was due and i rested and revived a bit. Now that my child is away on camp i can take some time for myself. My other child doesnt require such total committment and we can just take time out.

I had a psychologist but she became unreliable so am searching for another. Most wont touch me with a barge pole. Some previously got scared of my community. Well have get by using phone counselors for now. Can bounce off some worries at least.

@LadyCaroline It’s nice to see you here and there around the forums. There’s a careers side also which you might find helpful. Others in the caring roll facing challenges of all kinds.

I understand the ‘ most won’t touch me with a barge pole ‘ thing. It does make it harder though.

Time out from childcare commitments sounds needed. I hope you rest, and find things you enjoy doing.

Do you have hobbies/activities you enjoy. Or other stuff that’s helpful for you.? You don’t have to answer any questions if you don’t want to.

I hope today has some good in it for you.

Hi @-Rayne- I havent contributed for a while either due other offline issues too. I get what @formermember talks about lost time and child alters have some myself. I dont call them alters they are the community for me or rather us. I just use single pronouns because i may misspeak when with other people. Not sure what it is like for @formermember but we have our own personalities but have decided to live as a group allowing each to contribute as the need arises. There is still memory loss but some small amounts of information are maintained to allow cohesion. Sounds weird i suppose but it works, people view the unit as eccentric. I am not sure who the me is but i personally am not associated with most of the family related to the unit and often feel not in the unit (body) sort of a floating feeling.