Son (22) with schizophrenia

@Sophia1@Former-Member@Faith-and-Hope@Appleblossom@Carlachris@patientpatient

@eudemonism@Shaz51

Hello Forumland possums 🙂

My son told me yesterday he will be in hospital until 31st of May. He went in on the 9th of May. So a good 3 weeks there.

His monthly needle he has been on since last two years has left him feeling without any drive, motivation, emotionless.

He still has his mind troubling him, has had many sleepless nights. Consenquently he slept during the day a lot.

I am so proud of him as he is picking up confidence and most times crawled out of bed to his appoinments....He is slowly speaking his mind when he has his MH appointments and tells them exactly how he feels. Which hasn't been good at all, not wanting to be part of this 'schizophrene Reality'

He has indicated he wanted to change his medication, and this needs a hospital stay for monitoring.

So, after work, I see him for an hour or so, and sit with him as he makes me a decaf. He is taking it as it comes, and is in good spirits for now. He can sleep when he wants, doesn't have to participate to any fake (no depth) conversations with anyone. His ward is a quiet one with 7 other patients, he was an hour in another ward but he said he would have walked out, they were 'crazy' in there. Lucky he was approved for the quiet ward, as he is not aggresive and handles his anger ok.

He doesn't like talking to the hospital psch, is too confronting. Also in a room with no way out, closed doors and blinds closed sort of thing. He really doesnt know what to say to them. I said, well tell them it's all in your file right? He said oh yes, I'll tell them that next time. It must be so awkward for him. Who to trust?

I tell him his Opa and Oma are proud of him as well as other family members.

I sometimes ask if I can ring them during the visit so he can hear them and most of the time he jumps in the conversation and says a quick hello. His Opa likes to talk about the young nurses surrounding him, and they have a giggle. Naughty Opa. 🙂

His Opa is teaching us a wise lesson, keep the good humour up, see the funny side in things, the battle becomes somehow defused a bit...

Oh, he as asked me to finally buy him some new trackies, more then happy and he asked me to throw 2 old ones OUT! wow, He never throws anything out, eventhough they have holes in them and are getting too tight... oh no the weight gain due to meds grrrr

Re: his dad @Sophia1 Well he was supposed to fly over but I haven't heard anymore, so no news is good news! He will all of a sudden walk into our lives again, without warning....

Also I have left my boys room the way it was when he left. We discussed his broken stuff he's keeping and he wants to fix all when he feels up to it.

Speak soon, sorry it always becomes such an essay and I read a lot fron your too. I just don't always have time to react.

Lots of love

Grasshopper3

I like the sound of your boy. @Grasshopper3Good on him for learning to stand up for himself and listening to his instincts about who to trust. He has a sense of integrity, despite frequent stigma that those who suffer with MI are lacking in this regard.

My Opa also loved to flirt with the nurses and tried to keep hospital visits cheerful in that regard. Bloomin teutonic men ... Now that I think of it, it was the first flirting I came across ...

Good to hear from you. Not such a long essay for what is going on.

ohhhhhhhh Hugs my @Grasshopper3

Hi @Grasshopper3, how's it going? You are one amazing person. Thank you for everything you are giving to your son and to fellow carers.

@Grasshopper3

Very late here

.good news ...progress..most of all son is taking charge when he can..the staff sound respectful of his wants

My mind is weary..

your posts 💤are never too long for me laugh..

I genuinely care and want to know will write soon xx:face_with_rolling_eyes:

Hi,

I had to let you know how much I have enjoyed reading your posts. My son is 29 and going through "all that" too...

I attended a MH appt with him last Thursday, when he was told that his Community Treatment Order was going to to go for another 6 months...he was very upset. But it really is the best for him, otherwise he doesn't take his meds correctly and quickly goes downhill and last time he spent a few months in hospital.

He is very anxious at the moment and gets cranky at me, for not doing enough to help him, but I tell him I can only do what I do.

He is waiting for a letter from his his pscychiatrist, so he can apply for the DSP, his psych was very helpful. My son had terrible anxiety, not knowing what to say to him, but I said, just go in and start talking, Im sure your Dr will have seen these forms before. Forms and the like really freak him out.

I also met his support worker, he is nice.

My son is hoping to rent his own unit soon if he gets the pension, and I'm hoping he can get a little "normality" back into his life.

You must be so proud of your boy! Wishing you both the best.

Look forward to hearing more of your news,

Cheers Libra. xo

Hello @Grasshopper3

How are you and Mr Colgate today?

Loved reading that he makes you a decaf coffee during your visit....beautiful...

I can understand that he likes the sleeping when he feels like it...the smaller ward and basically being left alone apart from psychiatric sessions...That would allow him to feel respected and reassure him that he is being listened to .....so vital....

Yes humour....we all have to hang onto that....the overseas contact with oma and opa so important also...his extended family...

his overseas dad.,...phhht....don't even think about him now....he is not a part of the strong bond you have with your beautiful son....the journey you are both on together...the challenge your son is accepting so nobly...

your son truly is an inspiration for so many of us parents trying to better understand this illness...

I am amazed that you are managing to still work...perhaps it is a balance for you....another world that you go to...

If he doesn't know what to say in his sessions...You can always say to him to tell the psychiatrist exactly that...."I don't know what to say...I don't know how to do this...I don't know what you are expecting..."

Please Please keep on writing your beautiful essays...I love reading them...

I can see that @perseverer is reading too...I hope that your upcoming move is still happening for you...

hello @Libra I read that you too are struggling with learning how to deal with how schizophrenia can change a loved one....

all the best to you all

much love grasshopper 3 and Mr Colgate xxx

thanks @Sophia1, yes it has been a difficult journey. The prognosis is not great, he will have to deal with it for a life time.

I had a frightening thought the other day...who will take care/ love/ keep an eye on him when I die? I quickly told myself not to project too much into the furure. He has an older brother and sister, but they are busy with their lives, they love him heaps, but are not sure how to deal with him as he has been quite hurtful to them in the past.

His father died in 2004 when my son was only 15, his father was only 51...I don't think he has been the same since then, it was quite a shock to him. My partner now, has been attacked by my son in the past too and now is not too forgiving, so I don't get any support from him, unfortunately.

So at the moment, it's only me and the wonderful team at the hospital helping us to get through this journey, that I never ever contemplated before!!

It's amazing what life can throw at us!

I'm grateful for this forum to get things off my chest and read of others struggles.I find it very comforting to sit and "type it all out" lol.

Feeling the hugs, Lbra xo