Riding a wave

@Phoenix_Rising Can I hide in the underwater cave tonight - don't even care that I will be in the water!

I don't know exactly how you are feeling (because I am not you!) but I do know that the last few days I have somehow managed to stay alive - and by luck not design! I have thought of every conceivable (and achievable) ways of ending it - and even gone as far as planning and 'beginning' to carry out a couple of those plans. So I am presently in the middle of 'Operation Get Through Tonight' because that is as far as I can realistically see.

I have been the same over the last few days - I knew I was pulling away from connections here but could not find the words (and still can't). I am going through a very, very tough week and it is only going to get worse over the next couple of days - but I can't 'talk' about what is happening and I can't even find the words to describe how I am feeling. That makes it even harder to stick around - here and irl.

So all I can say to you is I HEAR YOU and I GET IT

@Zoe7 you can come. I'm sure @Former-Member will join us when she can.

@CheerBear is it ok if I take Squishy, Mr Seahorse and Dr Havetodo to the underwater cave with me tonight? I feel torn between wanting to sleep in your pocket and wanting to sleep in the cave. Tonight is a mega giant category 5 storm and I think I will be safest deep in the ocean with @Former-Member. But you know I'm still there with you even when I'm not, right? I will re-appear tomorrow. THANK GOODNESS we don't live on Venus!!!!!

The cave is super deep down in the ocean @Zoe7 - far below the storm and the giant waves. Come, I will show you...

awww @Phoenix_Rising It is beautiful I might need to stay there for a few days!!! Is there room for Toby and Cat also? Cat can snuggle with you, Mr Seahorse, Squishy and Dr Havetodo and Toby with me

That is the most beautiful underwater cave ..... ❣️

@Phoenix_Rising @Zoe7 @Former-Member

@Zoe7 There is definitely room for Toby and Cat. It has a cool view too - see. I'm going to snuggle in to sleep now - even though it is absurdly early. Today really has been the most difficult day I have had in a very very long time. And once again it is all to do with my darn therapist. Thank goodness I can count on Dr. Havetodo to do no harm!

This day is nearly done @Zoe7 and we both still have a 100% perfect track record of surviving each day. The storm can't last forever Zoe, it simply isn't in the nature of storms to last forever. It WILL pass. I hate how long and how deep your storm is and I hate that I don't have the slightest idea when it will pass...but I do know that storms always pass - I simply don't know when or how. We just have to stay alive. That's all we have to do. I wish with all my heart I could make your storm pass faster Zoe. I hope you can feel safe in our underwater cave tonight. You are safe here.

Hi @Phoenix_Rising 🙂

Sorry I took a little while to get reply to your post. I am glad to be here, too. Yes, sometimes we forget that, don't we? That it is about riding it out, rather thank working it out! There is no point trying to outswim a storm - even for a mermaid!

I would love to go and bunker down in a deep, snuggly underwater cave, where the water is still and safer. I know it can be hard to express yourself when you feel you have given all that you have to give, but I believe this storm will pass. But until then, I will stay in the snuggly underwater cave with you, @Phoenix_Rising.

I hope this storm doesn't last forever @Phoenix_Rising but it is a very long, very draining and very dark storm. I feel like I am drowning, struggling for air, every minute of every day. I very much get to stages when it is too much and I want to give in. I know you feel like that too. Tonight I just need to survive - with Toby and Cat in the underwater cave (with splashes of @CheerBear rainbow colours to make it feel even safer).

Goodnight little turtle - we just need to get to tomorrow and then go from there

That is the best underwater cave ever @Phoenix_Rising. I bet lots of cool jellyfish hang out there. They are so peaceful to watch - very calming.

Thinking of everyone dealing with rough oceans tonight @Phoenix_Rising @Zoe7 @CheerBear .

Thankyou so much @TheVorticon. Hope you are doing ok!