Depression- Really Struggling- may be triggering

@Faith-and-Hope@Shaz51@Former-Member@utopia@CherryBomb@NikNik

if you guys dont mind would you mind giving me your opinions on the psychogist situation too please, if not its fine 🙂

Hi @Former-Member

You can tag me whenever you feel like it - I am not inclined to respond to tags when there are a lot of people tagged - rather a couple get me as soon as I see them

I am not sure what happened with your therapist - I think you felt better after your session - which is a good thing - doesn't always work - but the last session I had with mine was back in February and I have not felt the need to go back

However I had a light-globe moment when I was there - I told her anyone could agree with what the therapist said - what any one said - and perhaps any person might be agreeable because it made sense - but really - REALLY -

Ah - we might not - we just agree because it seems to make sense

And she said she could not know what any one really felt in response to what she said - but I am rather different - I intend to say what I believe - having more education than most people she sees - and could I tell her about the great moments in my life

I did - and once I started I found no end to what I had to say - and no - that wonderful feeling has not happened since that day - but I wrote to her and told her how what she said had affected me and how much better I felt since then

So I would be glad to read your post wherever it is

I have a pretty big story - my past is checkerboard of dark squares and brilliant ones and I can recall the great moments when I have the need to remember that once I was younger and drove all over Victoria and Tasmana and off-road in Tassie too - not at all safe but fantastic to remember

I wasn't here much for a while - I was on holidays and then walking in the autumn air and catching up on things I had let go - but I have had my much-needed time out and I am back -

So feel free to share

Dec

Hi @Former-Member

You have sprained (ligaments) and strained (tendon) your ankle - that will be painful for a while and bother you more in cold weather - active people acquire such injuries through life - I have

It sounds to me as if your mother could be more helpful - my son was incredibly troubled and I would have done anything possible for him and I knew about his SI and SA and SH - and my son did not allow me to have any information at 16 - this was his legal right - but it did not help me - and yes - he did complete the act

So I do understand what you are saying and it doesn't upset me in the slightest.

Your mother could put herself out - on your behalf I do feel really sorry about the drama you don't need right now

My thought on the subject is to save those medicare appointments for now and see the suicide therapist - it does cost a lot of money - 10 medicare sessions a year are less than one a month and then you need to pay a substantial amount on top of that - I have been through that but I am in the position of using my private insurance for extra sessions - still a lot on top of that though -

So medicare certainly helps but you are a student and still need more income to cover this, Does your Mum help with this because it would not hurt her to do this - I would gladly have paid anything to help my son -

I gather your caring for your Pop is your income - do you get a student allowance? - Looking after your little sisters is WORK and a COMMITTMENT - and I really commend you to work at your studies the way you are doing -

I know this is your businesss - and you can tell me to shut up and I will - but you deserve to be helped out a bit with your caring for the little kids - that's all I will say on that subject

For me your continuing education is wonderful and you have trouble with SI which I have yet to learn more about in your case - and I think that the studying is the best thing - it will still be with you decades into the future - enhancing and enriching your life

To me you seem incredibly brave and strong to continue when you have bad times that I understand from a mother's point of view - and I hope you can continue

All the best with all of it - you are very kind to care for you little sisters as well

Dec

yes @Owlunar the injury was actually alot worse, theres still a tendon and 2 ligaments damaged after 3 years and you can see scar tissue which indicates that there was other stuff going on but my gp never did anything about it not even for the pain. he just said stay off it for today and try not to do excerise yeah wel i went to a podiatrist and ive still got these injuries and im having to wear orthotic shoes and im still having troubles with it.

my mother doesnt support me going to therapy in the first place- when i told her i was struggling and that i needed to see a counsellor she told me to grow and up and get over it. she doesnt know about my SH even though i think shes seen my scars but hasnt changed her perspective on things nor does she know about my suicide thoughts and extremeley close attempts

yes i wish i ahd just abit more help esp during the holidays and now as im studying and in my final weeks!

ok ill give you a quick lowdown aside from what ive already told you-

i have severe depression, severe gad, socail phobia, health anxiety and severe complex ptsd- one event was being sexually abused- yes intimately as well whcih disgusts me everday

th other event was my sister getting attacked by a dog and i was holding her in my arms when it happened and i take full blame for that as she was in my arms and if i had of moved my arm up it wouldnt have bitten her- the dogs slobber and fur swept against my skin as it launched

im dealing with other things as well other than MI such as mild scoliosis my ankle injury and something is wrong with my neck but cant figure out what yet

thank you for sharing my @Former-Member

sending you hugs my sister

hi @CheerBear

i dont have much choice but to leave this psycholigist through the program as she only runs through the program so i have to move on from her.

shes given me a contact thing that i may be elidgable for a few free sessions free through a company so im looking into that as i can get more session through them if neccessary but i think i can get up to 15 sessions free so that should be enough at least until the new year hopefully

i know @CheerBear its soo blooody hard changing all the time- this is the 3rd soon to be 4th psych ive seen since december!

Oh golly @Former-Member - I fractured a bone in one of my feet when I was 17 and had surgery many years later and today my GP told me I needed more surgery so I sure get that one

And the doctor told me to go back to work straight away to and it was a Worker's Comp issue too - that would be work care today

I wish your mother could be more sympathetic - my mother was very hostile to me through my whole life so I do understand - we have a lot in common

In no way could you be at blame for a dog attacking your sister when you were holding her - I can't imagine a child being able to protect anyone as a dog launched itself at both of you - that is so hard

And you have a lot of trauma - and your mother saying your are hypochondriacal as well - oh dear - I wish I could say more

I do understand your problems about gearing up for a different person for therapy - I have been lucky - I have had so many shadows in my past but always been lucky with people who will help - but not my mother - no way

Dec