My silent battles

@Flutterbug9 oh I'm glad to hear that that staff member was very understanding of your situation regarding your current finances!! I hope the upcoming phone session with them goes well for you, fingers crossed 🤞🏼❤️ as well as your upcoming session with your psychologist too 🤞🏼❤️

I’ve only seen this psychologist 4 or 5 times, already feel more comfortable with this one than the previous one who I saw for couple years @Blackcloud

There had been couple times where we ran out of time with comment of “we will continue this next time” by my psych. Last appointment I mentioned that this has happened twice and is something I don’t want to have happened. Psych apologised and took no offence to my words. Turned out we made the most progress with both agreeing on discussion points for next appointment.

i also mentioned something that the previous psychologist has said and said I didn’t like the way I was left feeling. Previous psych kept insisting I needed to do EMDR. As I mentioned to my current psych, I need to have 200% trust in someone to have them in my personal space. She validated what I said prior to, in her usual relaxed tone, “that’s ok, there are other options we can talk about”.

@Flutterbug9 yep totally!! Having a professional (a psychologist) that actually knows and understands what exactly we're looking for when we're being supported is sooo sooo important!! ❤️ and even important for our overall mental health and wellbeing too!!

It's also a great thing you figured out what type of therapy you know what works well for you and what doesn't ☺️

CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) I know for many neurodivergent folks including myself is something that needs to go in the bin because of how harmful it actually is for us in general.

I'm also really happy and more comfortable with my current psych as well, as she has a lived experience of being neurodivergent so its easy for her to provide an approach that is neuroaffirming (which exactly fits my needs) than every other psychologists I've seen in the past that provide the opposite clinical approach that has otherwise left me off feeling worse after.

Thanks for the info about CBT @Blackcloud

I have a note book I take typo each appointment.

I will jot that into it.

having the right professional makes all the difference. Regardless of the field of work. I’ve found I can’t get a connection when it’s not the right person. Had that type of issue with a lawyer I saw last year. Different lawyer and things went very smooth

Hello lovely,

Thank you for this update. @Flutterbug9

Looking into an autism or adhd assessment sounds like a really good idea if it resonates with you - good on you for following your curiosity and finding a resource/learning about their procedures! Flexible payments will make things so much easier, what a win. 😍

I understand the sensory overwhelm when things in the body already feel like too much. Loops will help heaps, I have some for when I go out. They make things a lot less dysregulating. I am glad you're investing in a pair. Let me know how they go. 💛

If the loop earbuds don’t work I’m going to have to seriously start thinking about not being able to go to some of my activities @AuntGlow

last few Thursday nights after being out playing Mexican trains domino game for few hrs, I’ve been struggling with things I’ve learnt are all connected to sensory overload, worst was bout of active SI one night.

my best friend whose adult son and grandson (ie father and son) mentioned a few things that is in her sons assessment, things she also does. She mentioned them to me as is aware I do similar things.

Croquet and trivia tomorrow. Not sure how I will go at trivia, one person who comes has volume control of off, loud or very loud. Thursday morning is my next psychologist appointment, wanting to discuss the assessments plus couple other things with her.

I bought 2 different loop earbuds to given me options with sound reduction @AuntGlow @Blackcloud @Chasingsunsets

collected them from the local post office couple hours ago and been wearing one set all afternoon. WOW!! Amazing how something so small can make such a difference.

I had planned to go to trivia this afternoon. It was cancelled short notice. Trivia is run in the afternoon only once a month. At same time as trivia is on, each week Ladies Only billiards has started. Really enjoyable afternoon and the sound of the balls hitting against each other has had zero impact on me.

big test will be tomorrow night where there will lot more people and lot more noise

person who has organised the billiards mentioned today the plan is to have up to 8 people increasing their skills, whilst having fun, with view of playing against teams at other places similar to where I live.

my next step is talking with my psychologist tomorrow morning. Based on one spot of her Bio I am would like to talk with her about autism and ADHD assessments plus any info she knows about firm Im thinking of having the assessments done at. Traits and indicators for both resonate with me. Any thoughts or info @Jynx ?

Aww amazing that you're looking into an assessment @Flutterbug9!!

Also, I love my Loops hehehe

Hmm something I found helpful was to familiarise myself with the DSM-V criteria. I think for my assessment I literally brought in a written list of examples from my life of each of the ADHD criteria in action 😆

You may not fit every criteria, and some of them I didn't even realise were applicable until later - I think largely due to how much I'd been masking and building habits to cope over my life. For example, I'm very rarely late - but I am still someone who struggles a lot with time-blindness. The only reason I'm not late is because I know that if I don't set like 2-3 alarms to remind me to leave the house, I'll get super distracted and end up doing something else for 30 minutes when I was supposed to have left 15 minutes ago... 😅

Also might be helpful to reflect on how the criteria have shown up across your life. Because AuDHD is developmental, you may be asked stuff about your childhood. I recall talking about how I'd always struggle to leave the house for school cos I'd forget where I'd kicked my shoes off the previous afternoon...

There's some questionnaires and stuff you could do too - I think if you search for like 'adult ADHD screening pdf' or similar, some should show up. It might save some time if you already have some filled out when you show up to the appointment.

If you have any specific queries or anything feel free to ask, and I will do my best to answer 😉

Everyone is different, and every assessment team/professional is different, so I can't guarantee my experiences are universally applicable (also I did my ADHD assessment like 8 years ago now so things may have changed) but I can certainly lend an ear regardless 💜

Some of the childhood stuff is going to be really difficult as I have zero recall of aspects of my life prior to adulthood. Also due to my mum being in control of almost every part of my life for many, many years.

I do remember some things from school days plus comments from high school reports.

I get the alarm thing. I have reminders for everything in my calendar on my phone plus actual alarms also.

I was supposed to have paid $$ to go to lunch, didn’t set any alarms etc. day after payment was due I got a phone call asking if I was still going etc. they let me pay that day.

Wish now I didn’t go. Sensory overload, felt completely out of my comfort zone due to inability to do small talk.

I didn’t know about the pdf, thanks I’ll have a look very soon. $2000 and 2hrs for one assessment or $3500 and 4hrs for combined assessment. Approx 8 weeks until report completed and for me to know results. It all got too overwhelming

@Flutterbug9 mm few childhood memories can be common amongst the ND community - especially for those who have childhood trauma. I think old report cards could definitely help - even if you don't have copies anymore, being able to recall that these things were noticed by teachers would hopefully help to paint the picture.

Sensory sensitivities are a lot, hey. I think it's usually more associated with ASD, are you getting assessed for both (aka AuDHD) or just ADHD? The small talk thing is such a mood, too. ADHD can be described as having an 'interest-based' nervous system (instead of 'importance-based'; more info here) - which is why some activities, such as chores or paperwork, can feel almost physically painful to have to attend to... and also why small-talk can be so challenging. So like, talking about things very surface-level can mean I'm quiet as a mouse, but if someone mentions a special interest, it's hard to shut me up 😂

Totally understandable that you ended up overwhelmed. It's a lot to process, and a lot of money. You don't have to do anything until you're ready 💜