My silent battles

@Flutterbug9 i hope you are having a calm night where you can look after yourself. being in hospital is a extremely stressful time. how are you going?

I was in hospital for pain relief infusion from Monday 25 May until Saturday 30 May, something I will most likely do twice each year for rest of my life @Bunniekins

on the Thursday I was told that one of my younger cousins has terminal condition and is not expected to be here in December for his 63rd birthday. The news upset me. His condition is exactly the same as reason for my mother in laws death. The news brought back lots of memories.

When I’m in hospital due to infusion, the cats are at the cattery and I take mixture of things as options to do to help pass the time

tuesday next week I’ll be in hospital for the day. I accepted offer from my pain management Dr to have Pulsed Radiofrequency Neurotomy done which is pain relief in one of the nerves in my right shoulder.

appointment on Monday has me feeling bit uneasy. Initial appointment with a new psychiatrist. I’m feeling bit uneasy as I had bad experience with previous psychiatric a couple of years ago.

thanks for asking. Much appreciated.

here for you if you want to and/or will help you talk about things happening with your mum. 🤗🤗

wow @Flutterbug9 everytime i read your posts i alwasy wander if i have written them, i've gone through so much of this

i had a psychiatrist who was also my therapist, he sent all my referrals, to a dermatologist, to a sleep specialist, whatever i needed. Why? i saw him weekly and it was easier for me. Sigh. This system is so stressful. I can't believe when trying to navigate it effeccitvely your gp let out his own issues on you. I'm sorry 😞

My gp can be quite good to talk to at times. One downside is she is a palliative care doctor who has patients she sees before coming to her gp practice. Its not unusual to sit and wait for at least 1hr for booked appointment @EternalFlower

Pain management clinic I go to is approx 30km drive from where I live. To me, makes more sense for gp to give me referral to local pathology place than for my specialist to do so due to the distances between plus available pathology places

im a bit annoyed with my gp atm. She would have had results of ultrasound showing small tear in tendon for 2 weeks prior to me going to hospital and didn’t phone me. If I hadn’t been in hospital plus had just let things go (doubt I would have) waiting for gp to phone, I would have been end of July before I knew about the tear and no guarantee anything would have been said unless I had mentioned my shoulder. I would have continued playing croquet each week and did, who knows how much, more damage to the tendon. To transfer to a different gp I’d have to drive at least 30mins one way as no doctors where In live are taking new patients

@EternalFlower @Bunniekins @Blackcloud @MissGremlin @AlwaysMyself

initial appointment with new psychiatrist went well. Next appointment to be next Monday. Nerves easing, replaced feeling of wanting to cry. Appears I’m might finally going to be given some meds to help lift my mood so I can start to feel some degree of happiness (🤞)

thinking of you all 💜

@Flutterbug9 so glad it went well sweet and I hope you get some meds to help you. Sending love and hugs ❤️.

@Flutterbug9 thinking of you hunny really happy the appt with psychiatrist went well (so hard to find good psychiatrists these days). love bunniexxx

agree with @Bunniekins a good psychiatrist is so helpful @Flutterbug9 well done for hanging in there

@Bunniekins @MissGremlin @EternalFlower

Things that stand out in my mind are I felt heard and not pressured. Psychiatrist mentioned it’s quite common for people with anxiety to also have OCD traits and asked do I have any, even possible, OCD traits.
Last year when I mentioned my OCD traits to me previous therapist I was told they were not OCD related and just habits I liked to do. Big difference. Comment by psychiatrist today sits comfortably with me.
I was surprised when psychiatrist asked if I’m ok about next appointment being in a week. I definitely wasn’t expected 2nd appointment that quick

@Flutterbug9 i don't know the situation but in general i think its good that they ask outright about this things, i also have some ocd traits, i can be a bit obsessive, and its only in recent months the public health team has asked me abot it. Its easy to overlook and not share these things. And being dismissed can make us shut down even further. I'm all for clinicians asking outright!

glad you were heard