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Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

I've been having chats with @AuntGlow @Jynx and @rav3n about my experience of chronic severe anhedonia and how the traditional 'behavioural activation' has not produced the pleasure/reward stimulation (even when sustained for 20 years of doing!).

So I decided to start a thread because I've come to realise this is a bit more common with complex/chronic depression that I realised, and a discussion around it at a general level might be interesting & helpful to others too -- both intellectually and/or practically 😊.

I invite people to share their personal experiences (postive and negative; what has and has not worked for them or people they know), as well as interesting articles or research, or treatment perspectives that relate to the topic. 😊. I am very much a believer that "one size does not fit all" and hence welcome the diversity of experience and advice without judgement.

To kick it off, a link that @AuntGlow shared to me which I found resonated with me a lot when explaining the challenge with severe anhedonia (as opposed to 'traditional' anhedonia which does respond to standard behavioural activations techniques), and some ideas on what might help people to start that process of being able to recognise and experience neutral and progressively positive things again.

https://yung-sidekick.com/blog/severe-anhedonia-a-somatic-and-behavioral-protocol-for-rebuilding-the-capacity-for-reward

I found it very interesting also to read in a research article (https://www.clinicalkey.com.au/#!/content/playContent/1-s2.0-S2213158222000559) about the link between what is clinically termed 'treatment-resistant-depression' and a higher activity level in the part of the brain that processes/encodes adverse or negative stimuli and a diminished sensitivity to the reward-stimuli (this is when compared to "treatment-sensitive-depression" and 'healthy control' patients). So potentially it could be physiological, and "trying harder" may not work if our brain is literally not processing the positive/reward stimuli!

47 replies

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In response to: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

@Flutterbug9 feel free to tag me if/when you want to voice your thoughts about your new psych and referral later on (whenever that is, if ever). *hugs*

Well done on getting some sorting done today! 🥰😍 thats great. Less mess makes me feel less stressed, so i hope it also helps you feel better after even if its not "positive emotion" like enjoyment i hope it is a decrease in negative emotion.

I realise it looks like I ignored @MissGremlin . 😬. I switched over to their thread to check-in with them instead. 🥰🤗

In response to: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Well done on unmasking @AlwaysMyself I find that as a huge achievement. I’m so glad you are able to acknowledge your feelings. I bury mine, maybe it’s something I need to learn.

It’s good that you had a moment where you didn’t feel as sad. Being focused on something else can help. Being at home you can feel whatever you need to feel and work through it as you need.

Today I have been mega busy. Cleaning windows, dusting, bathing dogs, changing bed linen… I’ve been in the go. I’m almost finished mowing my lawns, about an hour to go. Then I’m going to have a bath. My muscles and body are sore after having done so much physical stuff in the last three days. Apparently a bath counts as self care. Will I enjoy it, probably not but as you say, it’s neutral.

It’s good you have painting as something you can do. A neutral task. I often wonder if the neutral tasks will ever slowly develop into enjoyment or if it will always stay the same. I’m a bit downhearted a not feeling anything even close to joy. Just accomplishments, something to tick off

In response to: Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Well done - that is a LOT of housework! @Captain24

If having some external-celebration/support/recognition of your achievements helps even in the tiniest way, i would like to be able to help support you in that way. I find it helps me when I can't feel the positive from achievement, to have someone else tell me i did well also.

Bath definitely counts as self-care, if you want a bath (not a chore). 🥰. I hope it is physically soothing for your tired sore muscles.

Do you like adding anything to your bath? Some people i know like adding scents or bath-bombs, etc. Or having it candle-lit.

In response to: Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

All good @AlwaysMyself, I’ve done same with @MissGremlin

sorting the garage has 3 motivations

- less mess, less stress

- find things when I want them

- (eventually) take plans and put them into reality, kinda type of commitment.

my late husband and I shared hobby of model trains. After finding out he had terminal condition, he completely stopped working on his layout and we started making plans for layout for me to have. Deterioration in his health led to things never going further than a started plan.

one of my ‘childhood habits’ I know I need to work on changing is not crying in front of people. It can also take a period of time for me to register things. Last appointment I had with my old psychologist she said couple things that initially made me feel angry. I remember being pointed with what I said as a response. After the appointment when walking to my car I felt teary with different thoughts in my mind (her words in my head leaving me feeling I couldn’t do anything right). Drove to shops, bought what I needed and drove home, feeling numb the entire time. Garage door partly closed and all the emotions came again. Got into the lounge and couldn’t stop crying to ages. Two cats trying to work out what to do. (From approx 11yo I learnt not to cry due to verbal abuse. Escaped from childhood home and child of DV when I was 16 1/2)

In response to: Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Thanks @AlwaysMyself

In short, waiting for bubble to burst.

Fears psychiatrist won’t accept me or be a benefit last psychiatrist was total waste of space, my time and my money

fears things won’t run smooth with new psychologist. Last psychologist, who I last saw end of last month, ‘wasnt right match’, to put things politely. No mutual agreement on almost everything, no plans, never followed through on things (for couple of things).

In response to: Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

The entire house is dusted every window in the inside is clean plus all the other stuff. @AlwaysMyself. It’s been a non stop day.

I did have a bath. It was only to try and help my sore muscles, more like something that has to be done. I always set a timer for 15 minutes as I’ll get out earlier. But today I had a candle lit and had ‘rain in a time roof’ from the smiling mind app. It was relaxing and I stayed in longer than the 15 minutes. It’s the first time I have done anything self care orientated in many weeks. It was just nice to sit, stop and relax.

How has your day been going?

In response to: Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

That is fantastic re: bath @Captain24 😍. I am really glad it was a relaxing experience for you, and hopefully a good 'reward' physically after your big day of housework!

@Flutterbug9 I'm really sorry to hear the new psychologist wasn't the right fit. Is this the one from the first week of December? (https://lifeline.saneforums.org/t5/Talking-through-trauma-and-PTSD/Therapy-types/m-p/1775211/highlight/true#M8529. I looked back to see when the one I was thinking of as the 'new' one was from; before Jynx and I accidentally sidetracked the thread 😳). I think I've said before that I find the "finding someone who clicks and helps" is something that has been a mental barrier to me seeking help before also. I am glad that I did ask around though for a recommendation and subsequently reached out to the counsellor I see now; having her support has been really helpful for me. It wasn't an "instant-click" like I have felt twice in the past, but it also wasn't an "instant uncomfortable" - and now I feel comfortable with most discussions, and even things I never feel at all comfortable to talk to anyone about I can bring up or almost-broach (would be OK to talk about if she brought it up).

I really hope you also find someone who you can click with and trust. I wonder if you would feel able to voice your fears to the psychiatrist?

In response to: Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

@AlwaysMyself I saw psychologist ‘J’ for approx 2 1/2yrs, in September telling her for my mental health I couldn’t see her again. I told her I would like to transfer to psychologist ‘K’ if K had availability. J said she would make enquiries for me and then booked 2 additional appointments to see her.

my final appointment with J was in November during which she told me that my file was being transferred to K.

I have met and had first appointment with K. During first appointment I told K “there are things that have happened this yr I don’t want to happen again”. Also “things I’d like to have happen that never happened”. Her response was she would like to know what they are, only when I’m ready. I did mention couple things I don’t want to happen again.

first appointment went well and I came away feeling relaxed. Anxiety that was running high when I got to the location she works from had dropped away quite a lot.

part of my thoughts are it’s all too good and smooth.

’once bitten twice shy’ as saying goes. Part of me knows the thoughts aren’t logical. Knowing and believing are miles apart atm

In response to: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Looking forward to talking about this more and exploring what helps in the New Year

@AlwaysMyself @Captain24 @MissGremlin @Cuddlebear @Flutterbug9 @NightFury 🫶🫶🫶

In response to: Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

Re: Recovering from severe chronic anhedonia

That sounds good @AuntGlow. I need a lot of work on it

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