Oh no not again! - schizoaffective disorder ramblings.

Having another bad night, although I am having to wear the 'well mask' so as to not bring attention to myself. I don't like people looking at me at the best of times, especially when paranoia is creeping in. I keep seeing hidden nuances and messages in everyday objects. My head is pounding from over stimulation I think. Grrr I hate this!

No need to wear a mask here @Queenie

I hope you are getting some rest. The forums might not be helping the over stimulation, but if you want some company and support, we're here 🙂

flowers for you @QueenieQueenie, stay strong xox

Thank you @Former-Member, your flowers made me smile 🙂

I recently connected with an old friend via Facebook and had a long chat with them. The mask was off for once and I could chat without judgement (kinda like I can here). Very refreshing for Facebook! I am feeling a touch better today with the 'symptoms', at least I feel less paranoid.

To all those with psychotic issues and paranoia out there on the boards, this question is for you...

Do you ever find that intense paranoia can be triggered by a book, tv, movie, song etc? I am reading a book at the moment and am finding I am triggering off paranoia each time I read a little, thinking that the book has been written secretly about my life. The author's initials even match mine. I know in reality this is false thinking and I should probably just put the book down, but I can't. It is like I need to know how this book/my life turns out.

Is this a common experience or is it just me? Should I mention it to my psychologist/psychiatrist?

Feeling a little embarrassed.

hi @Queenie

In casual conversations with women I have been surpirsed how many notice and pay attention to all those little patterns and coincidences. I have it a lot too but I dont go into superstitious causes. I keep telling myself that I can make my own meaning, but not to let it be too elaborate. I feel a sense of connection if I identify strongly with a character, but the outcome in the book, you are reading is the product of the author's mind. I dont know how it will end and you should not take it as predictive, but maybe if it turns out well .. inspirational ..

Still it can be comforting to think we are not so unusual and lots of people view books as influential or even turning points in their life.

The fact that you posted about it, seems to be me a sign that you do see the distance between yourself and the character.

I spoke about this type of thing with my sister in law .. who was a teacher, vice principal and interested in MI as her brother had schizophrenia. I think we both ended up with the idea .. that humans need a sense of order and like seeing pattens and noticing things .. and it is ok to think and talk about it, but keep shy from special missions from God type of thing.

eg after looking for a car all I saw on the road were the same make I was looking at ... they just kept popping into my consciousness ...

I take it as a sign .. I am not alone ...or am on the right track .. but not too caught up in it ... its probably good to talk it out

Does that make any sense to you?? @Queenie

Makes perfect sense @Appleblossom! Last time I read the book, I ended up in hospital thinking the author worked for the government and was writing down my life. I started thinking the same again, the good thing is because I've read it before, I already know the outcome this time. It is about recovery from schizophrenia. Maybe, and excuse the pun, take a leaf out of that book.?

Lol .. take lots of leaves ... if they are productive for you in real life.

and then let them go .. if they arent really working for you

I think it is a way we can get validation about our experiences if we did not recieve much approal or nurturance when young ...... by reading them and relating to characters .. we see possible causes and connections ... and possible pathways ..

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