My life has been turned on it’s head 🫠😭

@Realness

oh and everyone’s pregnant 😩 I know at least 6 people…

I just feel so jealous and envious

jm not where I thought or hoped I’d be….

I thought by my age (28) I’d be married and starting a family soon…

im trying to stay positive and remember finding my person is inevitable but I don’t believe it at times… I feel so alone and afraid … I don’t want to date from desperation tho …

I know next year will be better tho. I hope!!!

@Fah

Difficult days.

But in all your writing I haven't heard you say I made the wrong decision.

Even though things are really in your face at the moment.

@Realness

thats true I think deep down I know it’s the right decision…. Still sucks and is hard….. I had to log out of his utube account last night tbh because I was checking up on his watch history sort of trying to find out if he’s trying to win me back

i don’t think I want that tho… idk what I want anymore

ive I’ve been beating myself up about so many things bc I’ve realised a lot…. Like that we were codependent…

bjt that’s not my fault and healing takes time… I need to give myself more grace, kindness and compassion…. Especially now when things r so hard emotionally and unfortunately now physically too. It’ll get better with time I’m sure ❤️‍🩹🤕

You're a wise owl, @Fah .

And still young. After the grief process who knows what's around the corner? Especially when you're out there meeting people at church and work.

The concussion sounds concerning - how long before a full recovery?

@Realness Haha thanks sometimes I feel old! I mean I’m just not where I thought I’d be, but I’m learning to let go and accept it 🙏🏼

im not sure how long recovery will take… I think another thing I need to accept. I think in 1 month I should be good… if I don’t over do it now…… it was so scary having no feeling in my right side… physio reckons it’s just my nervous system and it’ll return thank God! I need to remember the basics like exercise and sleep………. It’s just one thing after another but I’ve been thru worse and been ok ☺️

Ooh @Fah that is scary.

Did you end up taking your dog home?

@Realness

luckily no, bc I’m barely looking after myself rn

I think after my Xmas leave I’ll bring him here

itd be nice to have company, although he can be a rascal… honestly not 100% sure if his company is worth the responsibility (& him waking me up in the middle of the night 😩)

@Fah

Yes, it sounds a bit of a decision. Is that when you see your Mum when you go to visit your dog?

@Realness

no rn it’s her taking me to medical appts… I should really ask friends but I feel shy to

we had an argument after my last appt….. I can’t stand her…….

@Realness

Reckon I could ask a friend? How do I ask? I’m overthinking it…

I would get an Uber but I can’t afford to..