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really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 3:33 pm AEDT

really struggling

im really really struggling and i dont know what to do.

im tired and worn out and purely exhausted and so overwhelmed

ive recently been dagnosed with 4 mental health conditions and insomnia.

im caring for everyone and they still seem to expect more and more but i literally have nothing left to give. im completley worn out! and when i say everyone i mean my pop, my siblings, and my mum. my pop im actually a carer for so that i completelty done mind but why am i the only one making an effort elsewhere.

i literally have no friends, the only family i have are the above meantioned and i know its the not the end all but it would be nice it have just little bit of support as at the moment i literraly have nothing.

im working as both a carer and i also like a pet sitter but i only do horses. so in general i rug feed, treat wounds if neccessary ride, clean paddocks etc while people are on holidays only kind of busy trhough easter xmas and other special occasions. as well as cring for my own horses

i feel sick all the time, i shake like a leaf and im having trouble controllling anything and everything. i just cant handle it. its too much and i do know what to do about it

Content/trigger warning

79 replies

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In response to: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 3:48 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

Just breathe deeply @Former-Member, you're doing it tough but iyou have what it takes to hanginthere 'till the help you've organised comes round.
Pull back from some responsibilities and replace them with things YOU like, take time for you! What, if you could, cohhse to do for a couple of hours that lifts your heart (energises you)? I like a country drive to a mt top cafe and take in the, some sit on the back, garden, walk, i like to sew.
Be kind yo yourself !
Try get some healthy food into ya get too, fish, fresh fruit & veg, and lots a green tea xox

In response to: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 4:45 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

Hello @Former-Member

That sounds terribly exhausting, you are one tough person doing all of those things whilst dealing with your own mental health concerns, wow

I think what @Former-Member said is right - now really sounds like a time to push back and start delegating some of those tasks to other people in the family so you can get a break as your body is telling you that you need to, how are you able to care for your family and horses, etc if you are completely burnt out, it's just no good to anyone especially not yourself.

Be kind to yourself, it's not an option it's a must 🙂

In response to: Re: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 4:53 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

yeah i guess your right @Former-Member @Former-Member

alot easier said then done though

In response to: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 5:08 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

think I know what ya mean @Former-Member, i recently spent 19days with my parents (dad has dementia & mobility probs, mum has terminal cancer & then in hospital for days having blood transfusions, two dependent sibling brothers with paranoid schizophrenia & drug use always popping around needing money & eating the food and aggressively obcessing about their 'problems'. I was at the drs a lot, designated driver every day, cook, washwoman and carer for both of them while mum recovered a little from her critical level anaemia. Yep, it was full on and they called on me often, I didn't know what hit me - having lived alone for 6yrs letting myself go too much. What I'm trying to say is that you have to take at least snippets of time for yourself - I achieved this by having lots of resting 'laying down' throughout the day, even if its just for 10-15min, and or going for walks, or a cofe moment out - making the most of those moments. Its hard to put you first when you're not trained to but its time for you now to start doing this, respecting you too, at least in small doses. xox

In response to: Re: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 5:12 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

yeah i feel so burnt out already. my mood is just so slow and its hard to get back out of it.

ive come to apoint where i just done think i cant do it anymore. i cant handle anything and at this point ive already self harmed. i cant get my thoughts under control, im sick of arguing with people, my sisters being so demanding and my mother expecting so much out of me.

I CANT DO IT ANYMORE

In response to: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 5:31 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

Can you get away? a cruise? or visit an aunt? change of scenery?tell them - then block their numbers on your phone! It might blow away some cobwebs, even for a week end. Something tells me they'll manage just fine.

Self harm can lead to more serious behaviour. Think I heard you say elsewhere you have apts with your MH supports soon, do follow through or if you dont feel safe - talk with someone in emergency.

In the meantimr, pull back a little, preferably not alone, and get some rest. You do sound burned out - you need to take care of you too. hugz xox

In response to: Re: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 5:52 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

hi @Former-Member

yes im very burnt out. i cant think straight. im exhausted but despite being exhausted i still only get about 3-4 hours sleep each night sometimes 5 if im lucky and i dont sleep throught the day.

i wont block their numbers but even a day to myself would be nice although i actually wouldnt know what to do and 99% of the time i would proabably be worrying about how things are at home etc.

yes self harming has been almost a daily thing and i cant control it anymore but ive been trying to. yeah i see my gp every week. im not going to an emergency department though

i just want to curl away and hide and just give up

In response to: Re: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 5:54 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

and on top of all this im so nervous about test results and im sick of being in pain and not able to do a thing about it

In response to: Re: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 6:06 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

@Former-Member, I have to go do a fewcthings before dark so might catch you later. Try not to worry about test results "what will be will be" deal with it then. I make it a policy to spend at least 2nights away so you have an entire day in the middle to 'chill' can you take a friend? Definitely take a notebook, novel, coloring equip, radio, bath salts & candles,vya fav music & munchies, and pick somewhere where you can go for pleasant walks. Just a thought. Be safe xox

In response to: really struggling

Unknown userMember03 Mar 2017, 7:17 pm AEDT

Re: really struggling

Thanks @Former-Member

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