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Something’s not right

Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

Not sure how to say what I want so im just going to start. Was raised in a loving family, very Catholic and Labor. Priests and such were regular visitors. After one such man wouldn't leave me alone I threatened to tell. Afterall I had plenty of support. But I was presented with a picture of hell and told that any member of my family would go there if I did tell. My dad was very sick and in hospital and being there with him by myself I explained that I didn't like this guy. He said he'd fix it when he got home. That night an ulcer burst in his stomach and he died while being flown to a major hospital. My 9yr old brain knew that, not only had I killed my dad but I'd sent him to hell. The next day this priest began serialistic and ritualistic abuse. He'd made his point.

In my adult mind I know that I had nothing to do with dad's death but the doubt still remains. Studying child psychology in my teaching degree showed me theoretical view points but....and the buts continue.

Abuse doesn't just take away the obvious. I've lost faith, and cofidence, family, friends and I always come to the conclusion that it's my fault. Theory, as I said tells me no but my mind is often stronger and days like today, after months of no sleep because I'm scared to close my eyes for fear of what my subconcious will let in, leaves me exhausted, physically and mentally.

This is my 50th year...NOTHING to celebrate, only to mourn.

23 replies

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In response to: Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

Re: Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

Lol. @Baileyboy. Yes a nice thank you would be nice every once in a while.
I also make it a point to comment when I get good service. Or to compliment someone on their dress or hair or smile. It doesn't take much to brighten someone's day. A smile goes a long way.
And I imagine being a carer can quite often feel like a thankless task. So on that rare occasion - if your sister ever mutters those two special words - cherish it.
I'm off to bed now. I have a busy day ahead of me tomorrow.
I hope you get a good nights sleep. Sweet dreams.

In response to: Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

Re: Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

hello @Baileyboy @utopia @Appleblossom @Former-Member @Former-Member

I cant begin to describe the mixture of feelings that stir in me when I read of horrific situations like this.

Violation. I cant say any more than that, too painful.

You have had some very strong responses from people who know what they are talking about.

Yes having, empathy, caring, love and understanding are beautiful qualities, however we who have these qualities as I am learning again now, put ourselves at the bottom of the list.

We feel so strongly, such passion, we need to help.

I now know we also need to learn when to step back and let someone else help. You have been in the caring role all of your life caring for different people. Yes admirable, how wonderful also for your family who would cherish your loving self.

Who is looking after you? are you open to joining Carers Australia, their is a mental health section. Some excellent support and help available that I wasnt even aware of. Worth a phone call just to listen.

Are you open to trauma counselling, or have you been down that road?

I am going back into hospital on tuesday, I need to be held and kept safe for a while and just let be.

Even writing that sentence I feel the physical sensation of noticing my breath which is not usual for me.

Please look into some help for you, even if you dont use it, set it up and have it there in the background that might be all you need.

You do sound fatigued to me and needing some rest. Empathising and being there for others is very draining and exhausting. We are only human

You are very brave, strong, resilient and are entitled to have some of that empathy yourself

take care

In response to: Re: Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

Re: Past has intruded in my present...AGAIN.

i have done the same xxx

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