Feeling caged up

@creative_writer Don’t you have med for migraines? I suppose it could be stress head pain that’s hard to treat.

I don’t go out much at night anymore. Struggle to see clearly with the glare from the lights and get too tired. Has to be very special reason.

Your migraines/headaches could be psychosomatic like mine are. My back and neck always play up when I’m hypomanic and not sleeping @creative_writer .

Few of my social activities are in the evening anymore. My friends are aging like me or older.

@creative_writer Lack of sleep is bad for everything. If you can’t relax that is bad too.

Yes younger people go out way too late for me. We went out earlier when I was young but because my parents had MI they did not have rules about when to come home once we were teenagers.

My illness is strongly hereditary. I think my sister might be more effected than she acknowledges.

Yes I know MI runs in families @creative_writer . There is lots of it in my family.

I slept well again got up at 5.30am after 8 hours sleep. Waiting for chemist to open before I go for my morning walk up the shops. It is windy and cool but I soon warm up when I walk.

Don’t know if it rained overnight so will have to check pots to see whether they need watering. Have to water some indoor plants but will wait for it to warm up a bit.

Hope you slept better.

Good evening @creative_writer,

I am catching up on notifications and saw I still owe you a reply from this comment:

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@creative_writer wrote:
@AuntGlow we touched on developmental stuff. You can have loving parents but sometimes they can’t support their kids emotionally. I think I’ve mentioned my mum has her own mental health stuff which made it super hard. She has really bad separation anxiety from her adult children.

I lowered the dose last week on Wednesday and had a further dose reduction yesterday. The yesterday’s dose reduction sent me feeling unstable. I’m hoping I stabilise, I could barely sleep last night. I’ve had depressive and hypomanic symptoms simultaneously today. I was already depressed, but it’s hard when that high energy state kicks while depressed. Impulsivity can go up, and that is exactly what gets my supports worried

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Intergenerational trauma can be incredibly painful and I really want to validate just how hard it is growing up in that kind of environment. Our nervous system is not only supported by our parents, but also modelled and shaped, so it makes sense why your body and mind react the way they do. You are doing SO well to work towards reparenting and healing your nervous system and rewiring your familiar neural pathways. 💖 @creative_writer

I am curious to know how your medication is feeling today?

Hi @AuntGlow how are you today?

How was your evening event yesterday @creative_writer ? How are you today?

My mum had bipolar really badly and my father had GAD and depression. My sister thinks she escaped but I’m not so sure she did.

Sometimes I think she is depressed and she has a really foul temper and can be very selfish. Atm she is not sleeping properly and has been like that for years. She blames menopause but sometimes I have my doubts about that. In part it is grief - she lost her husband to cancer in his 50s.