Dear Karen,
Thanks, we had an ok time - although I knew we'd both have trouble sleeping (and we did), and I thought she might wet the bed (and she did) but I was prepared for that so it wasn't a drama just tiring. it was lovely being able to catch up with my friend for a short while before we were both needing to head off due to tiredness and an early morning start.
I also took advantage of being in town to see my son who's still at his dad's recuperating from glandular fever, and also my ex-husband. We had some important family things to discuss to support my middle child, which went as well as I could have hoped - so that was a huge bit of grace.
Then they both came with me to look at a new second-hand car (an older Camry) and sussed it out very thoroughly. I ended up buying it after negotiating the price down by more than a $1000. I will pick it up this week some time. Another bit of grace, as my current car is such a worry I think it might die before it gets me home every time I have to leave the valley.
I also managed to have a jammie day on Saturday so I felt like I had a bit of down-time in what is shaping in to an extremely full-on couple of weeks.
Hopefully at some stage I might be able to share the poem with you somehow. I'm really glad that you like the quote, it is one of my favourites. Your note book sounds like such a fantastic idea - a very beautiful and useful grounding tool. It makes me wonder - when @Hobbit talked about a safe place - is the inside of the pages of your book a safe place for you? It can be such a difficult concept when you've never experienced having that. I know until a couple of years ago any of those "safe place" type grounding/meditation exercises left me floundering, because I couldn't even imagine one.
Your new meds sound horrendous, and I can completely understand why seeing yet another psych would be very anxios-making indeed. Can you make some notes beforehand in case you struggle to talk? How did you go with the person you met last week - were they helpful? I really don't see why whoever is managing this schmozzle can't see how acutely retraumatising this is for you - because I reckon blind Freddie without a psych degree could see this. I hope and pray this will be the day of grace that you so need. A breakthrough to good long-term help.
I'm off to the big smoke tomorrow too, to see my psych. Not looking forward to the drive after having been down there today getting a referral to the RCH for my elder daughter. Tiring but worth the drive. Also had to meet with her school principal about what support she needs. The school is just awesome. I'm so grateful that the staff care so much about the students' well-being.
Yep routine and boundaries, when applied firmly with love, help make kids feeel so much more secure. I think they help me feel more secure too, even though I often struggle to hold some of the routines, especially the timing of dinner.
Take care of you too my friend. Go well tomorrow.
Hope endures...
Kindest regards,
Kristin
