Functioning with ADHD

@creative_writer maybe you could give yourself a small challenge to go out and find a swing in your neighbourhood? Like, over the next week or so lol I don't mean you have to launch yourself out into yonder suburbia right this second! 🤣

I had soooo many imaginary worlds going on. If you ever wanna do some writing games or anything, that could be fun? We used to play one where a group of us would try to tell a story one word at a time!

Funny how some memories that seem so indistinct can stay with us for ages hey @creative_writer.

You know, a lot of what you're describing sounds like what I'd call little t traumas. Big T traumas are significant events that push us into extremes of emotional states... but little t traumas are still painful and they have a cumulative effect. It doesn't surprise me you developed a super rich inner world and a dissociation habit. That's how our brains protected us from the distress of having to deal with stuff our tiny kid brains had no idea how to handle. I used to ride around on my scooter, in circles, for hours, just dissociating and playing in my inner world - cos I had no other way of dealing with the distress. Hypervigilance is pretty common for folks with C-PTSD hey.

@creative_writer oh true! Don't think I've read that one. But yeah it's nice to be a daydreamer, not so nice to need it because life itself can't keep one tethered.

Yeah it's legit so hard to find decent opportunities to meet people hey. I'm not surprised the notion of 'just be more social' feels like an unachievable task. Have you got any activities in mind you wanna look into?

@creative_writer yeah hard to find energy hey, especially considering how unwell you've been feeling!

I agree about the latter being worse. Unmasking is such a tricky one hey - we need to find that place where it's safe to be completely and unapologetically ourselves, but to find it it means opening up, which risks our vulnerable self being rejected or ridiculed if it turns out to be an ill-fitting or unsafe social situation. In my experience it does get easier the more you do it though.

And one thing at a time yeah? Maybe other events will be more approachable once the book club has become part of your routine! Starting something new like that can be super destabilising for us NDs hey. I hope it bears you much fruit tho!

I'm off hun, have a spiffy one and mayhap catch you tomorrow 😊💜

@creative_writer the cynic in me wants to just answer with 'capitalism' but I don't think it's time for that particular rant right now. I'm sorry that you had to waste time n money to be told the same thing hey.

Hmm... I guess if it is swirling around your mind, you could always share and like, just use more general terms and focus more on the feelings than the events? Of course, if you are feeling a lil fragile and like opening up might feel too overwhelming or anything, totally legit.

@Jynx no, I meant that it is expensive to fix a body that is broken. I know she said my body isn't broken, just doing the best it can, it feels broken. Like I know calming the inflammation will prevent further costs, but it is not cheap. I already figured I wasn't absorbing food right, but it means I need supplements because my body doesn't know how to absorb properly on it's own. I know I'll be off some of them in a matter of 6 weeks. Sometimes I wonder whether i should keep my expectations low this time because I have had lots of unhelpful experiences with other people. Last dietician I saw years ago said they was no treatment for leaky gut. Gastro didn't help and appointments were like super short and brief, no time to talk about anything, I suppose after the money.

People know leaky gut is linked with mental health and inflammation. Surely you should do more research so people don't, well develop lifelong illnesses or worse terminal illnesses. Gotta thank the pharmaceutical culture who wants everyone medicated. I do not mean that meds don't help, but people are often still sick on them. Maybe because they have leaky and irritated guts. I wonder if being bendy also makes the gut more bendy? I have wondered whether some people are more prone to irritated guts.

TW: suicide