FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

961 - 970 of 3,920

In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @AuntGlow how's your day been? How are you doing?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I am doing okay @NightFury! What is going on in your world? Do you have any updates for me after our chat last night? 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Glad to hear that you're doing okay @AuntGlow

What's going on in my world? What's new since last night?

Hmmm...

I had a small medical procedure done this morning. I had a local anaesthetic, no stitches but I'm all bandaged up and under advice not to do any heavy lifting, to keep it dry and bandaged for the next couple of days. There will be bruising and soreness, so far the bruising has already set in, but I'm only feeling it every now and then.

My morning was full of ramped up anxiety about that procedure. Afterwards, I didn't do a lot. I got a few small paperwork type jobs done, but have spent a lot of time on the couch. I started a diamond dot, the first I've ever done, just so that I had something to do. But tiredness hit, then heaviness hit.

Tonight...something's triggered a lot of feelings of loneliness.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

How are you going now a few hours after procedure @NightFury I hope you don't have any or at worst minimal soreness.

Sorry I was gone for a few hours I felt like I was chasing my tail with stuff from my club.

It was my birthday today (don't mention it to anyone) and I was hoping to have a quiet day maybe reading in the sun.

Ended up I only got 3hr 15mins sleep as per fitbit.

Then people asking me a million questions and trying to organise sports club stuff - I'm the secretary.

I had a difficult phone call (Happy Birthday to me 😒)

Anyhow I started getting ridiculously anxious that I couldn't do all this stuff in time. Anyhow I've had better birthdays but much worse one's too. Sorry to clog up your thread with my whinging

I hope you had a nice quiet day looking after yourself and doing post procedure self care.

Did it end up warming up a bit down there

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

It sounds like you've had a busy and stressful day. You are dealing with a lot and doing a lot - I can understand the anxiety you have about not being able to do it all in time.

I am...physically doing okay. The bruising has started to set in, but it's not too sore. Which is a good thing.

It didn't warm up a lot here, no. I ended up lighting my fire this afternoon. So it's comfortable inside.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hey @NightFury can you edit out the first line of your recent post it comes up on the landing page and I'd prefer it not to be there - Cheers

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

My apologies @Till23 it's gone.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Thanks so much @NightFury - I feel better now - I know it might sound a bit stupid. some times I write guff in the first two lines of my posts like about the weather or something, so people just go, oh boring and pass over it. I know it seems silly since it's a public forum, but you still don't really know people so some things you don't want everyone to read, even though we are allegedy anonymous. I sometimes just worry that people could join the dots.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

All good @Till23 no worries at all.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

It seems like today has been a lot for your body to go through @NightFury... anxiety coming up around your health and procedure are valid here, so taking things slow sounds like the best way to care for yourself. You're allowed to meet yourself where you're at with compassion and kindness, remember that.

And ooh, what is a diamond dot? 🤩

Tiredness and loneliness, I hear you on this... it would be hard to manage all of this on your own, so I can imagine having some real comfort and support right now would mean a lot to you. What might that look like you for tonight?

I have to go now, but please know I will be back tomorrow to check-in, and I will see your reply this evening. 💛

961 - 970 of 3,920