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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work


@NightFury wrote:

It's a lion @tyme with like a galaxy as the background. I used to love doing paint by numbers. I haven't done one in a long time though.

I hope it's okay to mention...I sat in on a client session the other day. The client has bpd. It made me think of you.


Lovely @NightFury ! The paint by numbers sounds amazing!

As for the client with BPD, I hope they get all the support they need. It's such an emotionally painful journey, but the rewarrds are enormous. I wouldn't change my journey for anything.

Hope you are okay!

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

It made me think of you @tyme in the sense that, it sounded like such a painful thing to experience. I have the upmost respect for you, for working at your own recovery.

I don't know how okay I am. I'm struggling with the depression side of things at the moment. One foot in front of the other. One day at a time.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I also applaud you for your bravery and resilience @NightFury . I know it's not easy at all. I'm sorry to hear that depression is really hitting you.

Do you think meds can help with it?

Also, how's your painting (and everything else in life) going for you?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I am medicated for it @tyme

It's hard for me to take them. Anxiety makes it a constant battle. So being consistent with them is hard. I try.

I didn't start the painting. I don't have a lot of energy to do a lot outside of get myself through work, come home, cook and go to sleep. So, I'm trying to work on that too.

I wrote a blog post, which I haven't done in a while. I spent some time reading for fun...I just didn't get to the painting.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Fair enough. There are a lot of things that come into play when it comes to meds.

As for painting... I hear you. When you are working, studying, resting etc, it's hard to get going with stuff like that. Even if I do any arty crafty thing, I feel guilty after.

Do you enjoy, or get much out of blogging? I guess it's hard if you don't feel you get much out of it. The last thing you need is something else on your plate @NightFury

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

When life is busy, art and crafts are just one thing that my brain doesn't deem pressing enough to dedicate time to @tyme. And sometimes I don't have the focus.

I love blogging. I'm careful with what I share and when I share. Which makes it harder to do. I'm afraid that my family will read it, and they will see. I'm afraid that I will say something that they will take as a put down or as a judgement and it will cause issues, tension and arguments. I'm afraid they'll find out about my mental health challenges. So, I tend to avoid blogging when I've got a lot going on.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I have been incredibly under the weather today. I can't say that I've experienced pain like it.

I suspect that on Friday, I strained/pulled something in my back. Saturday it felt tight, Sunday I was in a bit of pain, yesterday it felt better and I got on my foam roller and tried to roll it out.

I woke up this morning and the pain was severe. Everytime I moved, my whole core spasmed and it was impacting my breathing and even impacting my ability to talk.

Me being me...went to work. Perhaps no surprises there. And it was my worst experience with pain ever. Everytime I moved, everything locked up. I would freeze until it released, then move again and it would lock up again.

I even considered taking myself off to see a doctor. But nah mate, she'll be right...I got to lunch time and couldn't do it any more. So I went to the chemist down the road from work.

Intercostal muscle strain/pull causing muscle spasms. So I've strained, or maybe even pulled the muscles between my ribs and that caused muscle spasms in my stomach, my back, my whole core. They gave me pain meds.

They helped. My back is still incredibly sore, but it's not causing muscle spasms any more so my body can relax a little.

@tyme @AuntGlow @heartathome @AlwaysMyself @Shaz51 @MissGremlin @Jynx

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Ohh hugs 🫂 @NightFury

Hope you feel better soon my friend 🧡

Wish I could give your back a rub with fishocream

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hey @NightFury

I hope your back keeps improving! I'm glad the muscle strain is not causing muscle spasms anymore! Glad you got the pain meds and they've helped. I hope you can allow your body to relax a little bit and let your muscle repair itself gently! 💜

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Oh no @NightFury ! I'm so sorry to hear about your pain!

How are you feeling now? Have you been to the doc?

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