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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@AuntGlow I have the feeling that something feels off in my body again. My anxiety is tenfold tonight as a result.

I think...it's because maybe it's a combination of things but maybe my brain is telling me that there's something wrong with me around what's happened at work and in life things in general. I didn't get the teaching job at my school for next years because there's something wrong with me...It's just manifesting in my body as feelings I can't locate or really know what they are.

I think it's also the general fatigue that I'm carrying, it feels...heavy and like I'm dragging myself around. And it feels unusual. On top of a higher dose of meds and realising that they're having an impact on the way my body feels.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

All of what you are feeling makes so much sense. As we know, there's a lot of uncertainty and fear around what's going on for you, and I think anyone in your position would feel this way - so it's important to be extra kind to yourself right now, okay? @NightFury

The fact it feels unusual might be activating your anxiety brain to focus more on the feeling too? And that's when our minds can become an absolute flurry of activity!

I know this must be an awfully uncomfortable feeling to sit with... so would you like to try and redirect your focus for 20 minutes and see how that feels? 🫶

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I'm sorry @AuntGlow

I felt like I was at the point of triggering a panic attack and so, I decided to tap out last night. I did manage to calm things in my body and to get some sleep.

I woke up with that same feeling this morning, but not to the point of panic. I just have a vague, but strong feeling/thought that something's wrong.

We have our Leaver's mass and award ceremony tonight, so I might not be around until later.

I just wanted to let you know that I'm okay and apologise for disappearing last night.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

That's so okay @NightFury,

Good on you for listening to your body. 💛

I wonder if you can ask that feeling what it needs/what it might be trying to communicate to you?

Please let me know how tonight goes and NO apologies needed! 🥰

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @AuntGlow I've just gotten home. What a long day!

Tonight went well. I gave a speech and handed out the Arts award. It went to one of my students who told me today..."can I scream at (our principal's name) for not having you as a teacher next year? I know I'm leaving but I feel sad that my friends don't get to be taught by you."

I don't really know what that feeling is communicating to me. I know it belongs to little me. And maybe it just needs someone to hold it, a lot of love and care and healing.

Hope you are well?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hiya @NightFury 😊

What a beautiful little moment with one of your students!! More evidence that your view of yourself may not be entirely accurate 😋

How's your day going today?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

My counsellor wants me to write those moments down @Jynx and report back to her. I haven't written it down yet, but hope to.

My day has been kind of slow. The school had a transition day where kids transitioned into their new classrooms, and met their new teachers. I spent a lot of the day off of class.

I'm about to head out to another Leaver's dinner. The students I taught in grade 7 and 8 at my old school have invited me to their Grade 10 Leaver's.

How are you? It surprised me to see you on a Thursday...I had to check if I had the right day in my head. Lol.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@Jynx @AuntGlow @AlwaysMyself @Shaz51 @MissGremlin @tyme just a super quick message before I head into my event!

I just got off the phone!

I got a job! In January, I start work as a Behaviour Support Practitioner!

I am in disbelief!

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Omg @NightFury that's absolutely amazing, I'm so happy for you sweet. Congratulations ❤️.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

congratulations @NightFury 😍

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