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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

We seem to be on similar paths @AuntGlow

I've come to understand that I am not the kind of person that the 9 - 5, monotonous, ground hog day lifestyle suits. It's just hard to step outside of that and still feel like I'm successful and functioning. I grew up in a household where my Dad spent 50 odd years working as a butcher, my Mum is still in the same job she went into when she left school, just working for a different company and I feel a little judgement from them because that kind of lifestyle doesn't align with me.

We can give it a go next time I feel heightened.

I don't know if I have a sense of whimsy, AuntGlow.

I did a couple of things over the last two days, that I want to share with you...

- I received a call from the Uni this morning and was offered an enrolment package to do my Masters of Child and Adolescent Mental Health. I could have started this year, but I've decided to start in 2026.

- I also journalled last night, for the first time in months. I was frustrated following my psychologist appointment and I wrote about it.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I completely hear you. I have been fortunate enough to grow up in a space that allows for more freedom in this realm, but I understand that this isn't the same for everyone, so it would genuienly be so hard to shift this belief system... but not impossible by any means.

I say, listen to your inner rebel that goes 'f*ck it, I am doing me!' - I am sure they possess a lot of wisdom and are a really key indicator of what your spirit wants from this life. 🥰 @NightFury

These are amazing achievements!! How does it feel to take some more aligned steps forward?

And how did journaling feel for you? ✨

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I do have an inner rebel @AuntGlow but she's lost her confidence. She's made some decisions that haven't worked out for her and have been hard for her and now she's kind of lost her spark a little.

It feels good. There are things that I'm worried about, but it felt right.

Journalling felt a little weird after a long time, and more thoughts have come up around my psychologist and the appointment I had yesterday.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @NightFury ,

How are you going?

It's always great to hear updates from you.

What's on your list for tomorrow?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @tyme

I'm kind of emotional tonight. I'm okay though, just had some tears started in the Recovery ZOOM.

I've had good things happen today too though...I got an offer to enrol in the Masters of Child and Adolescent Mental Health, and Luna had a bath and a hair cut.

Tomorrow I have to go to work.

We had a public holiday today. So, no work today.

And I need to ring the Real Estate and find out what's happening with this house.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Awww @NightFury ,

Maybe those tears were needed? What do you think? Did you feel better after letting it out?

As for the Masters, I had to let out a giggle... what happened to the BREAK??? Nah, in truth, we support you with whatever you choose to do. If you feel studying is what keeps you going, that's important.

I'm also mindful that the house situation is stressful. How are you going managing to find something else?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@tyme I feel like there's more where they came from. I feel it in my chest. My heart hurts...not physically.

I'm still going to have a break. I can enrol, but not start until January next year. I was adamant that I needed a break and very protective of it.

I have been keeping an eye out for houses to rent, but there isn't much available and I can't really apply yet because my lease doesn't end until the first week in December...if I move I'll have to pay two leases and I can't afford that...but I'm also very aware that time is running out. It's stressful and scary.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Yep @tyme I was right there are more tears

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@NightFury hey lovely, how you feeling today?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @Jynx

Have been spirally today. It sucks, but I'm safe.

Last night had tears for hours, didn't sleep well and woke up stuck in a thought spiral. Work made it easier, but it's been present all day.

How's your week been?

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