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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

How are you today @NightFury 🥰

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Having a rough day @Shaz51

How are you?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Sitting with you my friend 🧡 @NightFury

Did the washing and watering the gardens

But it is very hot so have the aircon on

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I have the wood heater burning here @Shaz51 not necessarily because it's really cold, but more because I find it soothing.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Toasting marshmallows @NightFury 😍

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Just laying in front of it @Shaz51

In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hey queen!! @NightFury

So sorry for not getting back to you earlier, it's been a very meeting-heavy day.

How are you?

Did you end up sleeping okay last night?

I think it's really normal to have moments where you're sort of numb or detached from an experience. You have been processing and feeling so much... maybe it was okay for you to simply be in that moment?

Your list of intentions is wonderful! I think focusing on the balance of things you need to do vs. self-care and time for you is really important. Have you touched on either today?

And my intentions are to get the essay done and move my body as much as I can. Before my period, my anxiety brain is louder and my energy levels are lower, so I am going to try and be gentle with myself too. 🥰

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I haven't been great today @AuntGlow it's been a super rough day.

I slept okay last night, but woke up feeling like my brain was bouncing all over the place. I couldn't focus, and ended up being 20 minutes late for work because I couldn't follow my morning routine and get it together.

When I did get in my car to drive to work, my check engine light was on. So, it was a super anxious drive. A fella at work checked it out for me and told me it was okay to drive. I have it booked into the mechanic tomorrow ro find out what's going on.

My ability to focus and be present didn't improve and I had to force it, just so that I could function. I ended the day with a headache.

When I got home I was feeling super dysregulated. So I sat and tried to slow everything down with a cuppa, and had a shower. Which helped but I'm still struggling a little.

Your intentions sound great. I wish you all the luck with your essay. You've got this!

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Oh that sounds really tough @NightFury. 😔

Days like this, when things just keep popping up and you feel super heavy and overwhelmed are SO hard. I think feeling dysregulated in the face of pressure and challenge is perfectly understandable here. The headache from forcing focus is so real too... I am glad you slowed things down for the evening. I am proud of you for showing up to your day, even though it was hard.

I hope you get some rest and we will chat more tomorrow, okay? 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

How are you feeling today @NightFury 🫶

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