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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I was just telling Dreamy, I'm thinking about going to a morning tea for mental health and the Community house here tomorrow @AuntGlow

The flyer says it's to raise awareness for mental health, to build connections, to foster safe conversations and to provide details about support available in the area. This could be something towards building my support network?

I think I need more consistent supports? A month, sometimes a month and a half is too long to wait between appointments, but I'm not sure how to get that, just yet.

That's my plan, Aunt Glow....to ask the cards for guidance about my next steps regarding work and my home. Hopefully something comes from it.

The tapping worked well. It's just extra hard to remember to use strategies like that at the moment, in the moment.

I know you're off soon, but if you're here tomorrow can you please check in?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I think that sounds like a beautiful idea. More of this will be so, so soul-nourishing and safety-building for you. @NightFury

Let's keep working on some ways you can build connection and explore more further support tomorrow?

And I think the cards will hold some real insight for you - please feel free to share your answers with me. I would love to hear.

Please try some tapping before bed! (She has other tapping videos on her channel.)

I hope it helps you to get some more rest. 💖😴

In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

My apologies @Chasingsunsets I'm not ignoring you. I'm just...going through a lot and it's hard for me to keep up and easy for me to feel overwhelmed.

Hope you're well?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hello @NightFury,

I can see you have changed your name, I almost had a heart attack and thought I was talking to the wrong person all of last night. hahaha

I am so glad I wasn't and happy to know it's you. 🙊

How are you feeling today?

Here with you. 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

No @AuntGlow thank you for tagging me. I've been worried that I'd lose my supports here because they don't know who I am. So, I'm glad you're here.

I am feeling kind of emotional and teary this afternoon. I'm at bowls training though, can we have chat about it later? If you'll be around?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Oh no worries at all @NightFury, no need to apologise I know things have been super difficult for you I just wanted to check in and also let you know I hadn’t forgotten about you as I hadn’t been able to get on the forum but I had been thinking of you- just wanted you to know that 😊.

Definitely hear to support you, don’t want to add to your stress or overwhelm 🙏

Thanks for @AuntGlows post as I was a bit confused with your name change, I’m only new on the forum so taking a bit to understand everything 😊- glad I’m still chatting with you though!

Take care 🙏

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

It's okay! It didn't take me long to figure it out. @NightFury 😝

Yes, of course! I hope you're able to enjoy bowls as much as you can right now.

Know that all of your feelings are allowed. 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hi @AuntGlow

I'm home from bowls now.

I decided to get out of the house today, but I didn't want to go far so, I went to the mental health awareness morning tea, and then I went to an mental health week art exhibition that's on in one of the buildings we used to do paranormal/ghost tours out of. I wanted to visit. I haven't been inside that building for three years. It brought back so many memories and I think I spent more time standing and remembering...rather than looking at the art. After that, I went to a local Cafe for coffee and lunch.

For the last couple of days I've found that I really want to talk to someone about what happened. So, I've tried two different services and have been left feeling disappointed. It's not their fault - something isn't meeting my needs. And I feel weird saying that.

I want to sit down with someone over coffee and really talk. I don't want to feel like I'm taking up their time, or other people's time. I want someone to hold space for me, someone to help me feel "held." I don't want to feel like...people don't know what to do with my emotions...I don't know what to do with my emotions so, I want to talk to someone who does and who can hold space for them.

I don't know if any of this is making sense...I hope so.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@Chasingsunsets thank you for still hanging around to chat with me. I appreciate it. Thank you for not forgetting about me.

I apologise that the name change was confusing.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hello @NightFury 🥰

How are you xx Sitting with you my friend 🧡

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