FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

2,041 - 2,050 of 3,920

In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@NightFury I'm so sorry for your loss and I'm sorry i wasn't able to be there for you during this time. Sending you lots of love sweet ❤️

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Thank you for your condolences @MissGremlin

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Henlooooo!! How's your world @NightFury ?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hey @Jynx

My world's been tough this week and I'm exhausted. So, I haven't done a lot today. I woke at 7.30 am, got up, took my meds, then went back to bed. I didn't wake again until 10.30. I've done a couple of jobs around the house and watched a movie. I've just got a lego set out, but it's frustrating me, so we'll see how that goes.

How's your week treated you?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@NightFury well done for what you have done today my friend

on Thursday I was really out of sorts for some reason

@Jynx it is hard as Mr shaz thinks I need to be at the top always

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Sorry to hear you were out of sorts on Thursday @Shaz51 it's tough, my friend.

The depression symptoms got me good this week.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Oh that's rough @NightFury but glad that you are trying to do very little today!! Remember, rest is NOT earned, it is a need, like breathing.

What's the lego set? Frustration is a tough one cos for me it makes me wanna 'resolve' the thing so that I am no longer frustrated, but often the best option is to take a step away. Hard sometimes when I'm in hyperfocus mode tho, lol.

@Shaz51 that's so hard, to have such high expectations on you hun. Have you ever spoken to him about how it can make you feel?

Sending you both some very squishy hugs!

⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@Jynx I have issues with rest. I was battling guilt, battling my mind telling me what I should be doing instead. I should be studying, I should go out to wander through the market, I should go to the supermarket, I should get dressed and out of my PJ's. But my body reminded me of just how exhausted I felt when even the basics felt hard and heavy this morning.

It's the 101 Dalmation lego set I've been slowly working on. I've finished the body, just starting on the legs now. I was only frustrated at myself more than anything. I couldn't figure out how the pieces went together. I was frustrated because my brain wasn't braining.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Husband is getting there @Jynx

He does soo much for me and wants to help me soo much and I let him

So we can support each other

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

This whole post is very loud @NightFury hahaha I can relate sooo hard! Some days are definitely harder than others too. I sometimes have days where it is exhausting to just...walk into the kitchen.

So hard not to get the guilts hey, I think it's mostly conditioning (from modern society and 'hustle culture', this horrible perception than our worth as humans lies purely with how much we work and produce....UGH) but also sometimes I think it's cos it can be a struggle to just... sit with our thoughts hey.

How are you going with it now, did you figure it out? Brain not braining, oh man that is a BIG RELATE haha. You poor dear, I send you more hugs hehehe

(づ ᴗ _ᴗ)づ♡

2,041 - 2,050 of 3,920