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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

It sounds like you have been with him as much as you can right now @NightFury.

Sitting and chatting would be really lovely for him, I am sure. Does he live far from you?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

He lives in an aged care home about 30 minutes away @AuntGlow

It's hard to go and see him. He's frail and declining and it's difficult to see him like that.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I am sure that it's really tough seeing him so frail @NightFury, so your resistance here is understandable. How could you take care of yourself before and after visiting him? 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I'm not sure about before @AuntGlow but after is about managing my emotions and feelings gently. Doing things that make me feel held and supported.

Like right now...I could really use a hug, so I've curled up in bed with Luna.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Have you ever given yourself a self-hug? @NightFury I remeber in therapy once, I was asked to practice this as the pressure from as self-hug can be just as effective as from someone else.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

No @tyme I haven't tried that before. That's an interesting concept.

In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work


@NightFury wrote:

She does shed @tyme but less so when she's kept short. I don't really notice that she sheds a lot though. I used to have Luna and three other pets and the shed was just ridiculous, so I guess in comparison one dog is easy.

I have work tomorrow.

After work, I need to take my car to the car wash and go and see my Grandad. Then home to vacuum and mop the floors ready for the real estate to bring the photographer through on Tuesday after work hours.

How's your weekend been? What does your Monday look like?


I'm not yet sure what my monday looks like. I want to get through today first tbh 🙂

I have an assignment I want to complete after I log off here 🙂

Please take care and I'll catch you soon!

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Good luck with your assignment @tyme good night.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

What kinds of things have helped you to feel held and supported as of late? @NightFury 💛

Luna sounds like such a huge blessing for you. Was it helpful to give her a hug? And did you get some rest?

Looking forward to hearing more about your day. 🥰

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I'm sorry, I don't want to talk @AuntGlow but I know you're here. Thank you. ❤️

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