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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Acceptance is hard work

Acceptance is hard work

Before I start, I just want to say…that I don’t feel comfortable in this space. It’s hard to be in the trauma and PTSD forum, but for me at the moment, I’m working through a level of acceptance.

I don’t have a diagnosis, I’ve never spoken to or seen a counsellor, or received any kind of mental health support. I have a very good friend who works in a healing space and has seen and experienced the impact my mental health and my triggers has on me. She has a lived experience of CPTSD and she knows a little of my story. She has helped me with resources and just by being a wonderful safe space for me to talk about what I’m experiencing. She suggested that perhaps, I could be experiencing the symptoms of CPTSD.

I completed a self-referral for the guided recovery program and have started that process. It has me straddling the line of acceptance. I have always had “anxiety” and have experienced panic attacks and flash backs and all of those good things. My first memories of my anxiety was when I was a teenager. But now, I accept that it isn’t entirely accurate.

My brain’s blocked out some of my memories of what happened to me. Logically, I know that it happened, but it was as if…if I couldn’t remember it all, then maybe I could live with doubt and maybe that doubt was permission to say…”you know what? Maybe It’s not real.” And if it didn’t really happen, then I don’t have CPTSD.

I will also acknowledge that I have been fairly avoidant with seeking help for a number of reasons, but one of those reasons is because I don’t want to talk about/acknowledge that what happened, actually happened.

I’m in a space at the moment where I know that the first step for me is actually owning it and accepting it. But, that makes me feel very vulnerable, and the acceptance feels “slippery,” I can’t quite wrap my head around it, as if a part of me is protecting me from it, if that makes sense.

Last year, a friend (who is no longer a friend) told me in an argument that I use my anxiety “as an excuse” and maybe she’s right - but not in the context she meant it. I’ve used my anxiety as an excuse not to acknowledge that there’s something else behind it. Is acceptance something that you let happen organically as you move through life, and counselling and all the processes? Or is this something that you push yourself through, knowing that it’s an important step? How do you work through this process of arriving at acceptance on multiple levels?

@Jynx @rav3n @tyme and I don’t know who else to tag, I’m sorry.

3920 replies

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In response to: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

It's a relief to get it done @AuntGlow it was just another thing weighing on me. I was so frustrated at myself for not having the will power to sit down and do it, so today, I just needed to force the point.

I now have some breathing room from study. We get a week or two off before we start the next unit.

It is positive thing to know that I have time to find a new place for Luna and I to live.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

I get that, I have to do the same at times as well. Like a little 'tough-love', but without the shame that often follows. 🥰 @NightFury

I am sure this will give you some space to come back to yourself.

Absolutely. How is little Luna by the way?

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@AuntGlow Luna needs some TLC in the form of a hair cut and a bath, but I'm hesitant to do it because it's still too cold to cut her short.

I know you're off soon, so just sharing, I guess. You probably won't even see this before you go...but, I'm dealing with a lot of anxiety about going to bed tonight - it's the first night off of one of my sleep meds (I was only supposed to take them for 10 days).

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Hmm, could you start with a bath and cut her hair in a few weeks? It might be warmer entering Spring (how exciting!) @NightFury

I hear you, I know this feeling. I think it could be helpful to trust your body and remind yourself that sleeping is something your mind will allow when it feels safe. So, perhaps you could look at a wind-down routine?

I will be back tomorrow to check-in with how you went. 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Luna had a bath and a hair cut today!

She went from this shaggy mess of a dog...

To this...

 

She looks like a different dog when her furr is short. And I no longer feel like a failure of a dog Mum!

@AuntGlow @tyme @MissGremlin

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

AHHHH SHE IS SOOOO CUTE!! You are a wonderful dog mum. @NightFury

How was sleep last night? 💛

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Awwwww look at her @NightFury, she is absolutely gorgeous 😍. You are definitely not a failure as a dog mum though, life just gets the better of us sometimes and all our energy is put into simply surviving. She is still fed, walked and loved so very much and that makes you an awesome dog mum, I'm so proud of you sweet ❤️

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

Sleep happened @AuntGlow

I was still awake at 2 am, but in bed trying to sleep. I eventually got up, had a drink wandered around the house to try and break the circuit. Sleep then happened from 2.30 am to 7.30 am.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

She is my everything @MissGremlin and sometimes I feel like I don't/can't give her the attention she deserves.

In response to: Re: Acceptance is hard work

Re: Acceptance is hard work

@NightFury i do understand those feelings sweet. But you only have to look at that gorgeous face of hers to see how happy she is, you are doing just fine ❤️

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