Battles

Hi @rav3n I'm glad it brought a smile to your face too. I love it!

@MissGremlin cute animals! 😊

Hopefully 9th Jan will come quicker than anticipated, and in the mean time I hope we can do our best here to provide you support in whatever form that you need (even whilst the workers are on leave). I plan to still be around online during the 'break' time.

Re: hospital... admittedly a bird and a snake may be a little harder, but Casper might be allowed to join you in the hospital... i know my local ones have policies (esp for mental health and homelessness situations) that can allow dogs under certain conditions if there is no one available to look after them and it would be a barrier to care. For example, if someone were to rock up to the Emergency Department with just themselves and their dog - they will be let in.

Not sure if you feel comfortable doing that, but I know my local hospital has a policy specifically about that scenario 😉.

@AlwaysMyself thankyou ☺️.

I worry so much about the workers here being on leave (although they definitely deserve the time off), but I know there's a few of us that feel the same way and we'll all be here to support each other through that time.

I'm not sure the hospital here would allow me to have him in there. The snake and bird can survive a period of time without me but Casper is an inside dog and only goes out for walks or to go to the toilet or when we play outside. It's just really hard not having any support physically to help in situations like this.

How are you going today?

I'm doing pretty OK today, thanks @MissGremlin . Which also means I have increased capacity today support people (including yourself) 😊😉😋.

Know that if I could (and of course more importantly you wanted) I would offer for you to call me if/when you feel overwhelmed (esp after tomorrow when I won't have work during the day) to have someone to talk to in real-time. However, since we are not allowed to do that, know that as much as you feel safe to write on the forum (which I know may be limited because of both the public nature and the concern for 'recovery-oriented' and 'community-safe') you are welcome to discuss any topic with me and let me know if you're just wanting someone to listen, someone to validate, someone to problem-solve, etc etc etc.

By nature I am a problem-solver, but I try to remember that sometimes people just need a listening ear and someone to 'hold space' as they say. 🤗 So I'm trying to remember to ask if I'm not sure. I'm direct in a loving way!

@AlwaysMyself I'm really glad that you are doing ok today ☺️. I'm also so grateful that you are here to chat to and that you are so supportive, so thankyou for that ❤️.

Oh wouldn't that be amazing, sometimes I really wish it was an option 😂. I'm mindful about what I share on the forums for a few reasons, obviously there's the recovery focused and community safe which catches me out at times but there's also my safety and having to be careful about being identified and watched by people. Thankyou i really do appreciate it, it just depends on what's coming up for me in the moment.

I've gotten to know a few people here and what they need in the moment which is helpful, but yes you are right in that some like the help to problem solve whereas others just like to be heard and know that they aren't alone. I'm not always great at knowing what I need in the moment which can make it hard for me and for others trying to support me so I'll apologise in advance for that 😂

It's OK to not know what you need @MissGremlin - I'm often the same, because I know that there aren't "solutions" to my big problems but still sometimes it just feels nice to know someone else knows what's going on in my head and to have the sense that someone cares. And I guess that's where listening & validating comes in. 😊

Oh yes, sometimes I also make the decision not to go into what's going on inside because I don't want to then have to sit physically alone in those feelings (even if I have online support) - and also sitting alone in between post response times.

Sometimes I know my raw thoughts are not able to be posted here, but sometimes I am able to sit and think about how I can word them and frame them so they can be suitable and safe for the forum (within trigger content boxes). I was pleasantly surprised that it was OK for me to express my most-honest feelings about next year here, because I wasn't sure if it would need to be removed - but made it as well-framed/worded as I could.

Totally get the identification thing. I am lucky that I don't have anyone who is of a mind to find me or hurt me intentionally, etc. Initially I was concerned about identifiable things (eg my dogs - very unique!) and for that reason do not outright state what region I live in, but over the months I have felt safer and come to feel that I don't mind if the people who know me or I meet in passing connect my online & in-person self, and so have been willing to post photos of my dogs and in passing drop breadcrumbs about where I live. 😉

aw nooo, that's awful that they've just left you when you needed them most @MissGremlin. it's so valid that you'd feel emotional, you deserve to have people to lean on and support you. i know having an online community is different to face-to-face, but i am glad that we could be here for you in some way 💙

i do have to pop off soon, but i will be thinking of you. chat to you soon 😊

Thankyou for the support and the chats @rav3n. Hope you have a lovely night ❤️

Hello lovely! @MissGremlin

I am so happy to see how much support you have here. 🥰

It sounds like this appointment, was really really tough. And honestly, I am so proud of you for addressing what you were feeling, even a little bit. I know it must feel extra vulnerable having opened up and then not having an appointment until the 9th... it's good to hear that you know Lifeline are there in the interim.

I am wondering how we can all collaborate as a team to help keep you safe and more grounded throughout the next couple of weeks?

Some things that come to mind are:

Turning to Buffy/Angel for some grounding background noise

Yummy drinks, like your iced coffee

Cuddles with Casper

Colouring when it doesn't feel too triggering

Redirecting to supporting others here when you have the capacity

Looking towards what is within your control (just minute to minute)

And maybe, some connection to silly sock space too!!

How does this sound? 💖

@AlwaysMyself sorry for the delayed reply, I was getting myself into bed, although I've spent most of the day in bed.

I completely understand and it's very much the same for me in that there's no solutions to my problems but it's nice to just have someone listen and to be able to get things out.

Oh this I relate to so much, it's like if i open that can of worms so to speak then I'm left alone to sit with the feelings and emotions and that's tough.

Yes i get this, the thoughts that go on in our heads sometimes are hard to share and even more so to do in a way that is safe for the community here. It's often why i step back at times cos I just don't feel i can post safely or with that recovery focus in mind even though I desperately don't want to be alone in those moments. You did so well for sharing your thoughts and feelings and I'm so proud of you for doing so ❤️.

My previous account that I had here had to be closed down cos of a breach of safety, even now I know what I post is being watched and I don't like it. But at the same time this community means too much to me to lose it again.

Speaking of your dogs how are they going tonight?