Battles

@Nala2022 especially when i was sure to make it clear that i wasn't at risk of acting on them last night and simply talking things through.

He is very loving, he loves cuddles and kisses. Out of all my dogs so far and given that the others were all female, he's the most affectionate and such a big sook 😂. I managed to get up and made my cuppa, my head wasn't too bad when i got up so I haven't taken anything as yet, I'm hoping it will settle. I know most of it is just from the lack of sleep.

I almost got blown away outside 😂. Windy is an understatement! The sun is out but you can't feel the warmth cos of the artic blast.

I can see how that would have been unsettling for you @MissGremlin, especially since you were clear that you weren’t at risk of acting on your thoughts

He’s like an affectionate teddy bear haha. My cousin has a male Labrador and he’s the same, super sooky and always wants attention and cuddles lol. I’m glad you were able to get up, and your head isn’t too bad. It makes sense that you have a headache from the lack of sleep, so hopefully you can have a nap and get some rest later

I honestly hate the wind lol, but I also get bad hayfever so the wind does not help one bit. I’m glad you didn’t get blown away haha! 💛

@Nala2022 he most definitely is, he just thinks he's a tiny lap dog 😂. He's my shadow and follows me everywhere, just in case I get lost going from one room to another haha. Labrador's are just crazy but in a good way, they fill your life with love and laughter.

Not sure I'll get much of a chance to rest today, I've got the mental health team coming out which I'm really anxious about. I managed 5 hours of sleep last night but it was very broken, I just wish there was a solution to fix it.

Hayfever is horrible so can understand the wind not helping you. I'm lucky to not get affected, unless I come across a wattle tree, those I'm allergic to 😂. Definitely not a day to take the umbrella outside, I'd become Mary Poppins 😂.

@MissGremlin Aw that’s adorable that he just follows you around everywhere. They are beautiful little companions, even though they’re quite large haha

I can understand why you’re feeling anxious about the mental health team coming out, especially after such a rough night and only getting 5 hours of very broken sleep. I hope the visit goes okay and that you’re able to talk through some of what’s been happening and how exhausted you are. Hopefully you can get some proper rest at some point today, even if it’s just a little bit

It really is the worst! Oh really, I hope none are around you! Hahaha definitely not a day to bring out the umbrella

@Nala2022 they don't realise their size 😂.

It's also the fact that they closed off on me not long ago and left me with no support other than the support worker once a week that is unreliable. But it's a different person this time so I'm trying to focus on the fact that this experience could be different and I've already told them what I need out of them being involved so hoping they listen. I've just migrated to my lounge and I'm going to sit to do some diamond art, just not sure what movie to watch today. I watched Harry Potter yesterday, everafter and then I started with the shrek movies, not sure what I'm in the mood for today though 😂.

Thankfully the closest one is a fair distance away from me and I got rid of the lavender bush that used to be in the front yard cos I was allergic to that as is my oldest child. Think I'll be hiding inside most of today!

They definitely don’t lol @MissGremlin

I’m sorry you had to experience that last time, especially being left with so little support afterwards. But I really wanted to highlight the change in mindset you have around this time and how you’re trying to remind yourself that this could be a completely different experience. I think it’s really positive that you’ve already been clear about what you need from them, and hopefully they listen and you get the support you’re looking for this time 💛

Sounds like a pretty perfect day for movies and diamond art though! Do you also like the Fantastic Beasts movies? Shrek is so good! I love the movie Enchanted, have you seen it with Amy Adams? It’s such a cute movie 😊

Oh good, that’s lucky then! It’s so strange how we can be allergic to some things but completely fine with others. I think hiding inside sounds like a pretty good plan for today anyway 😂

@Nala2022 I'm trying so hard to advocate for myself to get the support I need, as I've said to them 'in order to survive this I need proper long term support as there's no way I can survive on my own'. I'm just hoping they listen, they know where things are at and that if I don't get support this time then I've made my decision already so I guess we'll see what happens (I'm safe).

I've never watched the fantastic beasts movies but I have seen enchanted, it's a great movie. Shrek and Ice age are 2 movies series that i love and watch regularly. There's a movie I want to watch, it's called 'It takes two' but unfortunately it's not on any of the streaming apps and I don't feel like putting the DVD on, it's a movie I watched on repeat as a child, I actually know it word for word and it's very much a comfort movie. As a child it gave me hope that just maybe I'd have a dad one day and also the possibility of having siblings given that I don't know my father, something I'll never know now anyway.

I just overdid things a bit, I cleaned my bathroom including the drains, my kitchen bench and my stove. I'm now sitting on my lounge trying to decide what to watch but there's alot of thoughts/emotions running around.

@Nala2022 I was trying to connect with the crisis service but it's saying it's unable to connect me at this time (I'm safe).

@MissGremlin I know it’s not always easy to advocate for yourself, but you should be so proud of yourself for trying. I really hope they listen to you and recognise that you need some proper, ongoing support

I love It Takes Two! I haven’t seen it in years, and I can understand why it’s such a comfort movie for you, especially with what it represented for you as a child

And you definitely did enough cleaning for one day! Cleaning the drains is commitment. Maybe it’s time to officially retire from housework and let yourself relax with Casper and some diamond art or a movie if you find one to watch. I hope it helps quieten down some of those thoughts and gives you a chance to unwind a little 💛

Oh no @MissGremlin , that’s frustrating, especially when you’re trying to reach out for some support. Hopefully it’s just a temporary issue and you’re able to get connected soon. In the meantime, maybe stay close to Casper and keep doing whatever feels comforting while you’re waiting 💛