Battles

@Shaz51 thankyou beautiful ❤️.

Heartburn is horrible, sending you hugs too sweet ❤️

@MissGremlin I wonder where the guilt comes from? Like a self-judgement about how you 'should' be experiencing it?

I think the point of art therapy is to tap into those non-verbal, more instinctual parts of our expression. It's not about our skill or the end product or anything, more about pushing outside the comfort zone to allow our subconscious a space to come forth. Or that's my brief understanding of it from when I did a unit on it at uni anyway 😉

Hope you're feeling a little better today. Been up to much this weekend?

@Jynx it comes from years of being made to feel things i was feeling weren't right or being punished for feeling something that i wasn't allowed to.

I was going to reply to the part about art therapy but right now anything I have to say is negative and putting myself down, so I'm choosing to say nothing about it. But I do understand the idea of it from what you've said.

Today has been really hard, I'm heading for a massive breakdown despite trying to avoid it. I went to the shops just before which were completely packed so that was hard but I made it through. I have a migraine as per usual and pain relief hasn't helped. I'm safe and I'm about to do a few things around the house but I'm truly feeling so broken.

How are you?

@MissGremlin a difficult thing to retrain your nervous system on, for sure.

Appreciate the discretion hun, I'm sorry you have to sit with those thoughts but I thank you for wanting to ensure the safety of the community on the same token.

Do you ever feel like the 'feeling of heading for a breakdown' can in itself make a breakdown more likely? If we tell ourselves something is inevitable, it can sometimes make it so. But if we tell ourselves that it may not happen, or that we have the power to avert it, it means we feel more empowered to avoid sinking lower. Just some food for thought 💜

@Jynx I've tried to get help before it happens, I've tried to pull myself out of it but it doesn't seem to matter what I do. Things are just spiralling so far out of control and very quickly. There's still a part of me that's hoping something will shift and it won't happen but with the way things are sitting right now it really feels inevitable. I've been keeping busy since coming back from the shops but things are starting to slow down now and i can feel all the emotions and thoughts catching up to me. I'm safe for the moment and I'm cooking sausages for dinner and reheating the broccoli and cauliflower bake that I made yesterday.

@MissGremlin I'm sorry that it all feels so overwhelming hun. I know that you're onto it with doing what you need to do to look after yourself, and I hope it stays manageable.

Hope the snags were tasty! And broccoli and cauliflower bake sounds like a good way to get some veg in haha. Did you know broccoli and cauliflower come from the same plant? Wild Mustard!!

Fun Facts with Jynx hehe

@Jynx i am trying to do what I can and just hoping that it's enough.

The dinner was ok, i wasn't really hungry but I ate cos I know i should. Haha I actually did know that one, still very interesting though.

I've just hopped into bed. Not sure what to do though. I finished watching true blood last night so now I need to find something else to watch.

@MissGremlin I was talking to ChasingSunsets about how it might be cool to have a 'fun facts' thread haha.

Hmm what shows do you have in your rotation? I have enough that I can sorta rewatch one every couple years... I've actually been watching Supernatural for the first time too. I think it was big around the same time as Buffy so I wanted to check it out. Haven't got very far tho... lol

@Jynx i was going to say the same thing. Me and @MJG017 used to share random and strange facts to keep distracted at all hours of the night.

I've just started watching Buffy again. I've also got the big bang theory which I've been watching but that's a different mood. Really been struggling with change lately so very much been sticking to the shows that I know well. I watched a bit of supernatural when it first came out but never got into it.

Aww that's so wholesome @MissGremlin!

Buffy never disappoints tbh. I can see why BBT would be a 'sometimes food' haha. I rotate between fantasy, cartoon, and sitcoms too.