Battles

@Chasingsunsets see even when you are half out of it you are still so caring about everyone ☺️.

I don't have anything on tonight and now that I've finished the diamond art I'm not sure what to do. I've got another to start but it's the last one I have. I'm worried I'll finish it before the others I've ordered arrive.

@MissGremlin Haha yeah, that’s been my whole life always caring about others 😊

I see re your art! You are very quick at them 🤩. I don’t have any plans either getting tired but don’t want to go to sleep too early lol

@Chasingsunsets it's a good quality to have unless you're like me where you give so much to others and wear yourself down completely 😂.

I've decided to lay on my lounge with Casper, he's laying on top of me at the moment. Can understand not wanting to go to sleep too early.

@Jynx thought I'd tag you over here now that Captain is going to sleep.

This is the part I struggle with, the crafts used to bring me joy but I don't feel that anymore. I feel like now they are just another chore that I have to do in order to stay safe. Yes I still like seeing the finished product and there's a sense of accomplishment once I've done them but they also bring a heavy sort of feeling that I'm not sure how to describe.

Last night got really scary after I had a bad reaction to a medication that I don't usually take (yes it's prescribed to me). I'm sitting in that space tonight of being in alot of pain and just needing relief from it but seems to help it. I'm safe and I'm about to start sorting the dots out for my new diamond art but things are feeling tough.

Evening @MissGremlin you bring up a really interesting topic I’d have to say. Definitely a few thoughts here. But I’d say I have done it for my whole life it’s what I’m use to, it’s really interesting. I’d give the shirt off my back to people, would I get this in return, nope do I care not really and don’t really look at what I’d get in return for some reason. I don’t really know the feeling of being looked after anyway so it’s hard to be upset if you never know what that looks like, it actually makes me uncomfortable the concept of being looked after or receiving help as I have just never learnt how that works. (Health care workers I can accept I was always in hospital from a young age so my nervous system knows there job/role, psychs- it took a lot to get use to but I got there). Family and friends a different kettle of fish.
Not sure if that makes sense, sorry if that was a bit much (not intended)

But it is definitely good to have boundaries and use discernment for sure I am certainly learning more, definitely feel like my read on people helps a lot can’t just be a door mat lol.

Casper being your therapy blanket gosh out dogs are good ☺️. Indi is soring almost time for the duck song, oh wait it’s too early for that yet 😂😂

@Chasingsunsets oh that i can completely relate to and it makes perfect sense. I struggle to accept help cos of how much I've been let down throughout life. The concept of someone actually helping me feels really strange and unsettling. I had more i was going to say but my brain has gone blank.

Casper is always a good therapy blanket. Haha awww sweet Indi, that duck song would definitely get her attention 😂.

@MissGremlin that anhedonia vibe is soooo rough hun. I hope that the joy can return, I know that might feel far away but it is definitely not impossible.

I wonder if art therapy might be something to consider? Something really focused on the process, on self-expression, stuff like that?

Oh that is scary! I'm sorry that it's been so hard and so painful. Tooth pain is extra rough too, it's practically impossible to ignore. I'm glad you're safe, and I hope that you are able to get off to sleep without too much difficulty 💜

@Jynx it's really rough. It scares me that I don't find joy in anything anymore but then if I do i feel guilty for feeling it.

I'm really not good at self expression except through poetry. I can't do anything group based either which makes it hard.

It's the constant pain that gets to me, when there's no relief from it. Every day I wake up with a headache that seems to turn into a migraine by the end of the day. I'm not even sleepy yet so not sure how today will go but for now I'm just focused on the diamond art.

@MissGremlin, it’s ok to go blank I think we both know it’s a heavy topic. It’s definitely interesting to chat about at times with some breaks so doesn’t get too overwhelming hey!

I’m still thinking about that sensory item Indi found I really want to get one! How’s your frog? has he/she got a name?

@Chasingsunsets it can be a heavy topic but yes it's interesting to chat about.

Haha oh that sensory item Indi found 😂. Frog is good, nice and squishy, doesn't have a name though.