Life can be a Pain

Certainly have never offended me @Former-Member - infact quite the opposite - always been wonderfully supportive

Hi @Former-Member

You are not thick and you haven't said anything at all to offend me or anyone else I could imagine

We can only write in an obscure matter in this forum - I can write what I have already written but someone broke a boundary I had set up and this was too hard for me - but it's over now and @Zoe7 was fantastic being supportive on both sides which was fantastic

But you haven't written anything that has been at all alarming - you are a sensitive person and are careful with your sharing - as I try to be - in my life there are things I just don't want to share and after all the years that have passed there is not point.

And we are all different - it takes a lot to ruffle my feathers - and in the occasional face-to-face conflicts I have now - often in the supermarket where people can be so rude - I usually give as good as I care - here things are more gentle most of the time and there is not need for conflict - and regarding conflict - yesterday certainly none was intended

I understand loneliness - I feel alone rather than lonely - there is a huge difference - but yes - now and again I do

But thanks - I am fine - and as far as I am concerned you are okay - there is nothing to worry about

Dec

Hi @outlander@Zoe7@Former-Member@Former-Member@Dazedandais@Phoenix_rising@Ant7

Oh dear - I can't seem to tag enough people right now

I have read some posts and wish I could comment and I will - Fridays a usually pretty busy for me - I have to go shopping later and see my doctor - my domestic helper couldn't come - which was okay - I was nursing a headache I woke up with - and it has gone now -

But sorry guys - I haven't been able to answer anything serious - but maybe a few more greetings will work

I'm okay - just a really slowl start and busy later

Dec

good morning @Owlunar

i hope the rest of your day goes well for you.

no need to worry about answering serious posts if your not up for it

'put the oxygen mask on yourself first'

Thanks @outlander

Just waiting for my driver now - and eating a protein ball - really yummy stuff whe ;astn lunchtime is complex

I will get down to the serious stuff later - maybe this evening

I recorded Outlander last night - I have never watched it before but I think it's one of those time shift things that I really enjoy. I went to sleep watching TV last night - I am so glad this new recorder is so good at doing what it's told - it's connected to my computer so when the time of the programmes change it fixes itself - science working for me

Oxygen mask - yes - I know what you mean - there are days when we need a little boost and a good self-help routine

Dec

outlander is one of my favourite shows. Niqua calls me claire because of her- the man girl character is called claire and to an extent i actually look like her.

i really hope you enjoy watching it- yes alot of time travelling thats the main idea and the complexity of it is so great but its easy to follow at the same time. the books are jsut as awesome as the tv show and its one of those things- is the book or the tv show better- i cant tell they are both jsut as equally amazing.

its good you have your recorder, youll never miss a tv show will you.

yes use the oxygen mask on yourself first, enjoy your day, recover and recoup

@Owlunar

Hi @Dec, haven't seen you a while, hope you are OK? Just want someone to talk to - you're easy for that (thank you). Can you come make me cup of tea, too down to get myself up. Thus my new profile pic. Was pressured into disclosure too here too which seems to have taken my sense of control and protection. My umbrella is wings, "under the shadow of his wings' is where my heart is taking shelter today. Thanks for your support re my friend dying (another thread), you've been there so I k ow you get it. I was OK till my son fobbed off yet another offer to come visit him, as he's sick. I need to, but... but he doesn't want me round, always has better things to do. Guess his not that sick then, but my heart is heavy, need to see him, makes me teary. He doesn't know that. Nobody wants my company really, dont really know why, is all of me that horrible, pople say the right words but dont live it, not one, in my real world. How does God put up with us. Just me today. no energy - maybe there will be if I get up and try, start in the garden maybe. We had rain over night. And a thick fog this morning. Hope you're OK? 🌷🌿

Haha, just fell asleep and woke with phone in hand but still waving it a bit becausevin my dream I thought I was holding a feather duster. Haha, do ya think the universe is trying to tell me something? the Holy Spirit ? lol haha, betta get up 🌿🌷

Hi @Former-Member

I have the kettle on ready to make you tea - I don't drink it myself but I do have the right tea ceremony where the teapot is scalded first before adding the tea - and then the water is kept boiling and the tea is brewed for a few minutes ands then - do you have mild? If you do the milk goes in first then the tea and suger? How many? - All this just for you and I am happy to do it

I have brought my own coffee - even though I just had one I am happy to have another -

Your profile pic - I saw that yesterday when it was a bleak, cold, wet day here in Melbourne - the people who organised the weather must have heard I was organising and interstate holiday - sure glad to get out of Melbourne for a few days in a few weeks

Anyway - there is no need to disclose more than you need to here. I have had reason to reflect lately that we need to protect ourselves in all sorts of ways - we only say what we feel okay about - I don't want to talk about some things in my past - old stuff - been there - seen therapists about it - told the same story over and over on Life Line and it has got old - it can still rear its head from time to time but let's learn to ride it through - only deal with what feels sensible for you

Your friend dying - that was a hard death - someone so young with young children - that is heart-breaking and we can only reflect that God is in charge of this and we do find it really hard to understand all of this and ask "why" - sometimes we might find some kind of reason but often not - really hard to understand

The man who would have been my father-in-law died young - he still had two young children - I had only recently met the family and I was too young to be useful but it was very hard seeing this - I understand your feelings

I understand how you feel about your son - I have been there with my daughter - she was prickly for a long time - young people have to fight for their independence - it's not easy for us as parents - it's probably not helpful right now but I found letting her have her space made it easier for her to approach me and I remember and afternoon when I got a phone call about her needing help to do a costing sheet - I am accountant and she had a new supervisor who insisted on the staff providing their own costing sheets and she was actually outside my place when she rang - as your son gets older he will see the truth that mother's can be useful people at times

But - ah - yes - the wait - that can take foreever

You feel like no one wants your company - I know the feeling but there it is - it can be really lonely but after chatting with people here I know it is something that happens. Sometimes people try to hard and this doesn't usually work. Loneliness does not draw people together - rough - I know - but I have learned to live without someone I can turn to when things get rough - maybe the Forum Family can fill this spot for you - it does for me - I do understand

God does not have any trouble with us - he came and lived with us in the form of his Son - and he endured everything - being different - standing out - he was finally betrayed and denied - his disciples left him - falling asleep in the Garden of Gethsame - yes - God really knows what it's like for us

I hold onto that - I love God and what I know - the NT is a better place to look for consolation -

I wrote most of this before but I was interupted - Friday's are usually pretty busy for me but I will try and look in later

Hugs - Dec

Hi @Owlunar, thanks for replying, and for the cuppa 🙂 " tea ceremony where the teapot is scalded first before adding the tea - and then the water is kept boiling and the tea is brewed for a few minutes and then..." Thi sounds like something we did our camping with dad at scouts ☺ no sugar for me, just strong, and a blob of milk 👍 I have decaf to keep you sitting with me longer, if that will help lol

Its really nice to hear you've got something to look fwd to with holiday in a few weeks 👍 wtg ✈

You said "only deal with what feels sensible for you (me)"

Most of you that matter here figured it out anyway, I had to make a break from being owl. Nik said people were confused blarblar... Interesting i was conversing happily with a few former foe with ease for weeks 'till after i was emailed (found IP address was the same). Now I know who's who, not that it matters much.

Yes, my friend dying is affecting me more than expected, hard to believe even with the warning cancer brings (unlike our kidz), didn't help that an ambulance went screaming past this morning, and a helicopter shortly after. Everyone knows everyone in these small towns.

But your right, God is in charge. I see the flesh is irreversably damaged by disobedience from the beginning, he keeps our spirit safe, will renew all things one day, we are eternal beings, I know it. That's our hope in Christ, to save our spirit. Can you imagine a new body without pain? My recently departed church sister and my girl have that now, I dreamed they met each other yesterday, like angels they were. Kinda said I'll join them soon and everything will be ok (whatever that means). It has been hard on the whole church, in terms of faith, as we prayed for healing, then it came, then it didn't, then it came, then it didn't - for 7yrs. Of cause Mental Illness didn't get a look in much on the prayer requests with all that happening - little harder to define I guess. When I tried to mention feeling suicidal quietly to the ministers wife once, she got quite antzy and snapped at me, "at least you have a life" clearly her reaction was related to the friend having cancer relapse that month, they were close. Basically learned to pull my head in on the 'mind/emotion" issues, which for me is my greatest struggle. Got sick & tired of beinf left out and having to always act stronger than I am and withdrew from the group gently, but stayed in touch.

My son does sound similar to your sometimes prickly daughter - she was. Young people do seem to fight for their independence. Giving them the space they need is a wise suggestion - I am learning this. But does your girl have suicidal thoughts? I don't want to let him withdraw into a pit, do want to let him know I love him and want him to live. Its good that you had something your daughter found helpful to give her. So far I don't, but he has said "just be there" hmm "But - ah - yes - the wait - that can take foreever" We really havecto just dependbon God. The Forum Family does fill the loneliness spot for me at times too. Look at this wonderful conversation here with you 👍

Yes, God, Jesus is acquainted with grief and loneliness, being in the flesh himself. I do appreciate we can share our faith here☺
Hugs to you too, my precious wise old owl friend.🌷🌿💗