Life can be a Pain

I bet you will be organising christmas for everyone - nope @Zoe7

I have a SIL who takes over and she has lunch every christmas and she even took over mr shaz`s birthday

and my aunty has held one at her place for the last 60 years

That is wonderful for you to have a break from all you do for everyone else @Shaz51 - justs lets you enjoy the day without all the extra worry

totally @Zoe7

hoping D1 and S3 will be here for a couple of days over chistmas

love the other 2 to come but next time xx

At least you will have some of the family there with you @Shaz51 - hope it is a really lovely time for you all

@Owlunar ....

@TAB@Faith-and-Hope@Zoe7@Shaz51@utopia@BlueBay@outlander

Aw - my mind has gone blank - I can't think of anyone else right now - I feel as if I am in a daze

Thanks so much for the beautiful flowers Faith - they are lovely - I do love flowers - they say so much all the time but more so on the dark days and this is pretty shadowy -

And thanks also for the cat comments Tabby Cat - I don't get a lot of them but that's fine - I always said it's better to fall over talking than to say nothing at times - but Vincents powders - yeah - they were really good and add a cup of coffee and they were even better.

Today is my son's birthday - yesterday was a difficult day - I got chores attended to and time passed - it got hot actually - first day of summer - then overnight we had really heavy rain and I had to get up and close all the windows - and I slept again and woke up with a rotten headache - I say 360 days of the year feeling okay, ordinary or actually really good - but the other 5 - today is one of the other 5 and I feel really crappy

And it will pass.

Last night perchance I watched Rabbit Hole - the weird place couples find themselves in when a child dies - it was a weird movie - I will most likely delete it - I don't know if anyone else's grief is likely to make me feel any better today - there are days that just have to pass

And of course I miss the cat - I feel so unhappy that she has gone even though I know I did the right thing - aw - cuddling her and talking to her was how I managed the shadows - and she left a huge shadow - she used to pour oxytocin into me and I would feel better stroking her and so that didn't happen - I cooked baked chops and vegetables and made my vegie soup as well yesterday -

There's too much happening right now - my daughter has an operation on Thursday and she is working every day until then - and I have to do something about Christmas - I can't focus right now -

I will be okay - I always am - my headache has edged away and I am so tired I wish I could sleep and maybe I will later - I thought I would check in though -

Everyone here is so supportive - it is fantastic the way everyone supports each other here

Dec

Thinking of you especially today @Owlunar Anniversaries are hard at any stage but they seem tom get worse at this time of year because so much other stuff is also happening. Grief stays with us but we learn to deal with it better as time goes on. Combining your son's birthday and the recent loss of Companion Cat would certainly be affecting you this weekend but you are a strong woman and you will get through this - maybe a sleep is what you need today to help with that.

Many hugs for you today Dec