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Something’s not right

Don’t want to accept the pain

Don’t want to accept the pain

Why can’t I pretend the pain isn’t real, maybe if I tell myself I’m okay and I don’t struggle with mental health I’ll be okay. Maybe if I tell myself that the traumatic memories aren’t real, then I can finally feel whole and less gross. Maybe I’ll just wake up from this dream soon and I’ll find peace within my mind when I do wake up. Maybe I’m okay, maybe there isn’t anything wrong with me

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In response to: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

@creative_writer oh for sure, online content is so hard to avoid and manage too, not always easy to prevent being triggered.

outta curiosity, have you said those exact words to your family before?

i come from a south asian family so i've always felt super uncomfortable and scared to say that sorta stuff to my family, and it defs made my childhood isolating.

you absolutely deserve a safe person. not sure if i'll get to chat with you more today, but i'll catch ya tomorrow - take care 💜

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

@rav3n I haven’t said those exact words, but I have tried talking to them about the trauma. They didn’t know what to do or say, they felt uncomfortable, so I stopped talking about it. I don’t even know how to find a safe person, I haven’t all these years.

I hope you take care and rest up. I hope you feel better soon 💝

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

I've lost so much

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Sitting with you @creative_writer 💜

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

@Ru-bee I don't know how to ever feel safe again. I have experienced too much

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Are there any moments or spaces that help you gain a sense of safety @creative_writer even if just temporarily?

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

@Ru-bee there are things I can do to feel safer, I do find it hard to experience that prolonged safe (even if I am). My brain is wired for trauma

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Will I get back what I’ve lost?

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Maybe we can't ever really get back things that we've lost @creative_writer but maybe we can build something new over time, something that's different from what we had, but that feels okay

In response to: Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

Re: Don’t want to accept the pain

@Ru-bee I know I can’t get it back and the only way forward is to build something new.
I still want that stolen piece of myself back. I didn’t want things to end up like this, I had imagined life differently
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