Life and trauma

@MJG017 i hate long weekends, they mess with my routine. I can't hope, not at all. I'm prepared for the worst but I have nowhere to go so it's either going to be car or tent, neither of which are really safe given my situation.

It feels like that at times, unfortunately it all goes on priority so if it's heart or breathing related it's high priority whereas mental health, minor pain, falls etc are low priority so it can take hours for an ambulance to show. You'd be surprised how busy 3am is, when I did volunteer ambulance work most of the call outs were after midnight and into the early hours of the morning.

Why are you guys having a long weekend in SA? @MJG017 @Former-Member We need it over to handle a cyclone!

You’d be surprised how busy EDs are in the early morning- usually worse on Saturday and Sunday early mornings!

I reckon @Former-Member that if the news is negative, that you should try to negotiate an extension there to “secure alternate accommodation”.

@Former-Memberwhat about boarding houses. I assume they are a thing in SA. Is there places for women in distress like they have for people escaping DV? I know it will depend where you are - these places are more likely to be in cities like Adelaide. I think you said emergency housing was over full. But some place that doesn’t deal with all homeless people might have places.

@Till23 it's the Adelaide cup on Monday.

An extension won't change anything cos there is no alternate accommodation sadly.

@Till23 I've tried. Like I said I've exhausted all possible avenues.

Try to thing positively @Former-Member . I know that sounds patronising, but a bit more time, gives you time to organise your belongings. It’s a roof over your head for a bit longer. Even if it might not change the situation. It gives you longer to organise, keep cooler for a few more days etc.

I know you are putting on a brave face on here, but you seem to be thinking clearly and still assisting other people on here

@Till23 i hear what you are saying but my brain really is working against me. Yeah it might buy me a little more time but there's more at stake than just my belongings.

Assisting others is what i do, i can't fix my own problems but I can help others with theirs. That brave face is quickly diminishing, I'm tired, I'm scared and the unknown is unbearable.

But I'll force a smile, fake a laugh and pretend that everything is ok.

@Former-Member I know your brain is working against you. That’s why I’m trying to put a little ray of light in there, to help you see another perspective. I also know it’s not just your belongings.

I know the waiting seems almost worse than homelessness, but it’s not.

Your brave face might be slipping due to tiredness. Would it be some good self-care to have a lie down, maybe you’ll drift off to sleep which you probably need. All this anxiety you’re likely having is very tiring.

I wonder if being on the forums is a kind of distraction, which I know is a strategy you utilise. But remember to look after yourself. You know what they say in an aeroplane emergency, put your own mask on first.

@Till23 i appreciate the efforts. There is no glimmer of light for me at the moment and if only people could know the reason behind it they would understand why. I'm sorry you experienced homelessness, it's really something that shouldn't even exist in this day and age but things have really gone backwards.

You'd think I would be tired, while I'm exhausted it's not the sleeping kind, it's mentally and emotionally exhausted. I'm not able to rest yet, I have to be up until about 10pm tonight until I can enjoy the comfort of my bed.

The forums are a good distraction for me, I'm doing my best to look after myself. And right now all that looks like is me breathing, keeping my heart beating and colouring my pictures while I'm listening to music. I'll be ok, I have to be, I'm not allowed to show weakness, I'm not allowed to show emotion, I have to be a pillar of strength for everyone else.

@Former-Member I assume you feel you can’t share the reason or are unable to, for some other reason, which is ok. I don’t know if you’ve been able to talk to anyone about it, but hopefully.

You seem to have a lot of “rules” like not going to bed until 10pm. Not “allowed” to show weakness or emotion. Where are these “rules” coming from? Are they standards you impose on yourself?

I think it’s ok not to be the pillar of strength, at least not all the time.