Life and trauma

@Former-Member

I just feels like you're handling these things better than you were, like they're not as overwhelming and overpowering as in the past. Maybe not, but it was just my impression.

Can't wait to see the mandala.

@MJG017 maybe, maybe not. I'm going crazy at the moment, ok I know I'm already crazy 😂. I finished my mandala so now I've got nothing to do. I'm bored and wide awake, anxiety is being a poo and I have a million thoughts racing around in my head. There's 12 days until I'm homeless, 13 days till my birthday and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do or how I'm meant to feel.

So how's your night going 😂.

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@Former-Member wrote:

So how's your night going 😂.

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@Former-Member Ummm... better than your i guess 🤣 To be honest though it has been a very tough week mentally. I suppose we both have unwanted realities hurtling towards us and we don't know what's going to happen or what to feel. It is scary alright.

So your birthday is the 14th then. Hopefully a new place to live will be an awesome birthday present for you. I was just going to get you socks! 😃

@MJG017 I'm just at that point where if I don't laugh, I'll cry. So I turn everything into a joke even when it's inappropriate 😂. We both definitely have unwanted realities to face and there's no easy way of doing it and it's scary as hell. I can't even begin to imagine how you are feeling but know I'm always here to chat and support you however I can ❤️.

You would be correct with that date, it's just another day for me, nothing special. Unless by some miracle i can magically get an extra $50 a week, I'm not sure a place to live is an option for my birthday. Guess I'll settle for the socks, at least my footsies will be warm 😂.

@Former-Member

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MJG017 I'm just at that point where if I don't laugh, I'll cry. So I turn everything into a joke even when it's inappropriate 😂.

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I've made an art form of this the past couple of years. I've not come close to finding a better way of keeping the realities in the back of my mind and stop them dominating my thoughts. Whatever works. The workshop i went to, there was a psychologist at my table and I had a bit of a chat to her about my less that stellar experience with psychologists. She understood. I told her how I keep myself on top of things by treating things joking about it all and trying to distract myself as much as possible. I said I know this is just hiding it all away but she said if it works for you then it's perfectly good to do. I thought about that and now think those realities will come soon enough and when they do maybe i'll be in a better place to deal with them

because I haven't let them wear me down as much as they would have if I didn't distract myself with jokes and Lego.

I can't say birthdays thrill me to pieces ether these days. But obviously the priority for you at the moment is housing. So hopeful there's some good news on that front soon for you.

And I do appreciate the chats a lot, the same with all the support. It means a lot to me.

@MJG017 that's the thing some would see it as hiding from it and not facing reality but it's not letting things bring us down, we know it's real, we know what's coming but until that day comes there's no point letting it get the better of us. Once we get to that point we will deal with it however we can. Keep reading and telling jokes, keep building that Lego and don't forget playing with those gorgeous kitties.

It feels like a lifetime waiting until Wednesday and after the inspection until I can submit this letter to the land agent. Who knows how that will go but I can only but try and hope for the best.

@Former-Member

I couldn't agree more. I others think it is so easy, i'd happily let them have a go and show me what i'm doing wrong. So far no one has taken me up on the offer. Which sucks, because as soon as we swapped places for their try, I was going to run off! 🤣

I'm keeping everything crossed for you that there's some positive result from the letter. The whole rent thing is out of hand. They know they can find people who will pay more, so If you don't have as much money then you're out! It really is criminal with these rent prices now!

@MJG017 kind of like 'tag you're it' and run off 😂.

The rent thing is definitely out of hand and I don't know why the government hasn't done anything to stop it. Everyone is just money hungry, but it's destroying lives and families.

You got any plans for tomorrow well today technically now 😂

@Former-Member

Well, a cynical person might say the the Government doesn't do anything about it because most of the own multiple rental properties. Which apparently isnt a conflict of interest at all. But as i said, only a cynical person would say that.

No plans at all today. Not a great day to be honest so I'm not even going to try and do anything. Just a bit of a self-care day I guess. I'm okay, just a very tough day.

How are you planning to see off the weekend? Are you continuing the mandala?

@MJG017 yes only a cynical person would say that. It's honestly crap in my opinion.

Sorry to hear it's not a great day for you, hopefully tomorrow is better.

I'm having to deal with seeing someone that i really hate having to face, just hoping the time goes by without incident, an hour down still another hour to go. Then I need to go to the shops which is going to be fun considering my anxiety is already high. I finished the mandala last night, but I'm almost out of gel pens so now I can't do anymore pictures until I can get some more pens.