Anxiety is high

hello and hugs my @BlueBay 😍

glad you saw your regular GP today xx

lots of rain here today

Oh no hope no floods @Shaz51

We had rain this morning but now it’s stopped and the wind has picked up.
cooking a corn silverside for dinner.

hugs to you too xxx

corn silverside for dinner. -- yumm @BlueBay

no flooding here , we might get cut off but not flooded

hey @BlueBay i'm so sorry you felt that way, but i assure you that no moderators are annoyed with you! the question about 'what you want from the forums' is referring to our 'tell the community what you need' guidelines, it was asked from a place of wanting to support you better, not shoo you away. sorry it came off that way, we care about you heaps 💙

happy to hear you got to have another beach day with A! that's really great that you've spoken to your GP about the meds too, hope you're starting to feel better. sounds like you took a big step and opened up to your psych via email!

i can see that these last few week have been really eventful, sending you hugs and hoping this week is brighter for you 💙

Thanks @rav3n

Hi @BlueBay

Glad you came back. Tea sounds yummy!

Hi @Shaz51 wet here too

These highs and lows are so hard to cope with.
crying today about my poor dad who I can’t see

it’s really like that he is not here anymore. There’s no difference. J is m mourning the loss.

the intensity of these emotions are really strong.

I’ve made an appt for a massage only 30 mins for Thursday morning.

Yesterday snd today I’ve been home with no noise at all. No tv or music.
it’s strange because the first thing I do is always put the tv on. It’s like I need to have quiet.
noise has been triggering me lately especially loud music.
hope everyone is doing as best you all can.

@Snowie @rav3n @Shaz51 @tyme @Eve7

Hi @BlueBay

I'm sorry things have been hard today for you hon.

Can understand wanting it silent. There are lots of times where I won't have the tv on. I hate loud music/noises too.

Well done for booking a massage in. Hopefully something to look forward too.

hey @BlueBay did something happen with your dad?

i'm so sorry you've been feeling this way, i know that the adjustment to the empty house hasn't been easy at all. i'm not a fan of loud noises either, i prefer quiet/subtle background noises. glad you've booked in that massage, you definitely deserve a self-care treat 💙

are you doing anything today? staying inside or going out for a bit?

Long story short reg my dad @rav3n

14 yrs ago I remembered I was sexually abused by 3 family members. When I told my mum she verbally abused me. It was horrible. I walked out hysterically. She snd dad didn’t talk to me for 4 years.
after that we reconciled for a year then mum started another fight and we stopped talking.
Spoke again for a year or two then they got invited to our D engagement. They refused to come and sent back invitation. No card or gift yo them.
last April my son came home from overseas and he wanted to see them. I also found out through my sister that my dad has cancer but they refused to tell me. So according to them I don’t know.
my mum is a controlling manipulative narcissist. She hates me for ruining the family by staying I was abused as a child 9-12 years old.
last contact was Mother’s Day last year. I decided to call her to wish a happy Mother’s Day. Mum answered the phone. As soon as I said it was me she - hung up. From that day I thought stuff her I’m not contacting them again.

but my dad is soft caring and kind. He does everything she tells him. He has no mobile phone or computer.
in previous years I’ve sent dad a birthday card to which mum sent it back.

so I’m the bad one. Everyone hates me. I see no siblings except one. But she is not that close either.

😢😢😢