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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx I'm not a debt collector, I'm a deck collector, I thought we established this.

But the way, I don't understand the term 'shakedown' but it doesn't sound positive, thus giving me icky feelings.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@rav3n morning

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

morning lovely! how's your day going so far? @avant-garde

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@rav3n curled up in bed with my teddies, art class isn't for a couple of hours yet so taking it easy

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde sounds cosy, how many teddies are keeping you company on your bed?

art class seems fun, do you get to do your own thing? or is there an assigned activity?

In response to: Re: Running

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@rav3n about 9ish I think

Own thing, I'm a class of 1, there's typically no one else doing art on a Friday except me

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

aww you got a pillow pet too! i miss mine @avant-garde love all the lil plushies. i only keep one teddy on my bed cos i tend to shove them off the bed in my sleep 😅

ohh i'm pretty surprised more people don't show up. what are you going to work on in today's class?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@rav3n finishing my little ones memorial (the one with all the hearts)

My bed is in the corner, the teddies protect me from the wall.

I like just me, they purposefully don't let other people do the class (it's more like a drop in class), I'm the exception because they know they can leave me alone to do other things and I typically don't need help.

Just give me my paint pens and leave me alone kind of thing. I like it that way.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

ooo nice, keen to see the progress!! @avant-garde

ahh yep i get you, that's pretty cool that they trust you. i like working on my own with art too. sounds quite peaceful honestly. do you anything on after art class?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@rav3n my social worker is in the same area so I normally have an appointment with her afterwards and she likes seeing my art and learning what it reflects for me

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