One Day at a time here

Oh dear @Shaz51 . I can understand that, and it's good Mr shaz could tell you what happened . But it would be a pity to miss the grandchildren's Christmas.

Christmastime is a bit fraught for me because I have to choose between two branches of the family. One branch is fighting within itself too, but they'll still be upset when I don't see them Christmas day. I'll try to see one person Christmas eve or Boxing day, and be with the bigger group for Christmas lunch (I'd accepted when the other person had blocked me - I'm not sure why they'd done that but their mh isn't good and they get upset easily). I'll catch up with the others some other time.

Families can be complicated can't they.

I hope Mr shaz is a bit calmer after processing what happened and telling you about it. I feel for you trying to be the peacemaker.

Sounds like Mr Shaz is having a hard time atm @Shaz51 - I know for myself, when I'm super overloaded it's very easy and tempting to just throw in the towel. I also know when I cool down again, sometimes I regret making big decisions whilst I'm flustered, overwhelmed, or activated. Hopefully he will come around.

How are things going today?

seems a lot better today @Jynx , @Dimity

hubby is still talking about thing always happens to him

he was upset that none of his family rang today to see how he was

with our restless night sleep for both of us

we went to the city to pick up something that he ordered for me 6 weeks ago

and then i got another present and morning tea

than he was ready to go home

he said he is going to ring mental health tomorrow

For me @Jynx , @Dimity , @AlwaysMyself , @Till23

I can not drive

my family that lives close dont invite me to anything anymore

my cousin and family are coming up and staying in the city and has invited us to go there but hubby will not want that

will see what happens with his family ?

Very cute teapot @Shaz51 and a lovely thought.

Glad Mr shaz feels able to reach out to his team.

Very warm here. Debating whether to go back to the garden (already done some weeding).

one of the pot plant on the patio looked sad so i have watered all them @Dimity , will need to go water the gardens outside

I feel for you with not driving @Shaz51 . It does cut you off.

I wonder if your cousin can drive to your town? It's a bit awkward.

I never used to go out but a minibus picks me up for my new groups.

@Shaz51 I'm glad he's a little better today, and planning to ring MH tomorrow. Seriously what a fab teapot!! Cute lil kissy kitties!

Sounds tricky to not know what is gonna end up happening with seeing your family, I hope you can figure something out that won't end up too stressful 🤞

Garden sounds like the place to be @Dimity (unless you're already kaput of course 😅)

Sorry to hear things are complicated @Shaz51..

I can understand how difficult not driving can be. Where I live there is very little public transport so I'm very lucky I am ok with driving.

Sorry to hear about the difficulties within your families.

I hope Mr Shaz can settle a bit more.

Lovely teapot he got you

Hope things settle for you

I'm sorry for your family situation with both Mr @Shaz51 being upset by things they said (and not wanting xmas with them) and by their lack of support/visting you. And you already have such a heavy load with health too. *big caring hugs*

I hope your cousins and family make an effort to visit you, even if you cannot go out to them on xmas due to Mr Shaz.

I was thinking about what you said re: ASD diagnosis and his processing it.

What does a diagnosis change for *him*? In his eyes and emotions. How does he *interpret* meaning behind it?

I wonder if there could be a way to reframe the diagnosis as a sign of how strong he has been all his life? To have been high functioning *despite* living in a world designed for neurotypical people and him having to adapt/mask/etc to "fit" the mould and the extra stress that it brings?

Perhaps a relief that his MH is not his "fault" but could be significantly impacted/exacerbated (or less responsive to traditional treatments) due to ASD neurodiversity factors?

Have to start work now, but was thinking about it whilst i got ready for work and wanted to ensure to pass along my musings just in case they help.

Either way - ypu have my support and care and friendly love.