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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Aww, thanks @utopia, not a good day today. put a spwel on the sleeping thread but its too hard to type everything in my day or on my mind. You're sounding good, yes?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Shaz51, ask hubby to join in on our group hug.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

will do @Former-Member my friend

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Former-Member. I'm going okay. Ignoring what I can't make sense of - seems the best option for me at the moment. Keeping my head above the depression.
Self love @Former-Member plus group hugs from us - will do you the world of good

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Shaz51. Hugs back to you and hubby. I hope he's feeling better tomorrow

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Group hug for @Shaz51 and Mr Shaz

Dec

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Morning @utopia Sorry I disappeared last night. I felt like something had been taken out of my hands (although it was done inadvertently) and it got to me a bit. I decided the best way to deal with it at the time was to simply go offline. After the day I'd already had I just felt like there was something else I was planning that was taken away and again I had no control over my life. It just felt like another kick on top of all the others. Not anyone's fault - just added to my feelings of disappointment and lack of control over anything in my life.

Hope your evening was better and you slept last night.

Have a good day at work xxx

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Zoe7

I just "went off line" last night @Zoe7 - for no reason other than I realised how late it was -

But obviously something happened that has concerned you deeply - and your life feels out of control

After the nightmares I had early this morning I can understand things going out of control can be completely outside our management - feels terrible - I get it

Do you want to talk about it? It's okay here - you are completely anonymous - and no names are used - nothing - it's really safe

Dec

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Decadian It's not something that is really because of anyone else it's just something that happened that really echoed everything else happening in my life.

Sometimes it seems no matter how much I try to set goals or do something that I can really 'get into' it is taken over or taken away by someone else. I do have issues around being in control as this is something that has been taken away from me so many times for so many different reasons and I feel like I have no power over my own life.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Zoe7

I can understand how frustrating that must be - did you mother take your things away when you were a child or were you stopped from continuing education or taking work opportunities when you were a young adult - cause I really get these -

Those kind of things have a terrible drag on your adult life - it takes a lot to overcome them - I know - mostly I resent leaving school before I was ready - but I went to night school instead - and then when I was at university and my son was such a handful people kept telling me to stop my studies because it was too much for me

This would make me feel angry and I persisted with my studies and it held me together - but it was hard - it was - really so terribly hard - I don't know how I did that now -

But if you have a past of having things like that taken from you - then that is something I know you are trying to overcome and that will be hard for you - because we all fall into a trap of seeing things the way they were when we have no contol

Really Zoe - I don't know that much about you - maybe you are still in a place where you have no real control - that is not good - we all need freedom of choice in some areas - even if life circumstances take some choices away from us

You only have to share if you want to - it can be hard I know

Dec

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