Listening to triggering music

@creative_writer oh cool, good on your cousin! Are you two close? Feel like you've mentioned her before. How did folks tend to react to her openness? Did she end up facing some stigmatising responses? Could be something to chat to her about if you wanna work on being able to be more open.

Alas I think that's sorta the toss up. It shares parallels with being closeted queer to my brain, insofar as it being the choice between hiding your true self, and being open and potentially facing backlash, stigma, discrimination... it's not an easy choice, and you gotta make the one that will help you feel most safe. Which I think makes sense right now while you focus on finishing off your degree!

Oh yeah I bet, heat plays havoc with your migraines ay. Day of sounds delish! Gonna be a blob on the couch or like, do something creative or...? 😊

@Jynx I don’t know how people reacted to her opening up. I don’t have much contact with her. The last time I interacted with her was years ago when I was overseas on a visit. Her personality is very different to mine. I am a lot more reserved. Her younger sister is probably closer to me personality wise.

For me I think it’s about finding my people so I can be open with them. It’s not always appropriate to be open in certain situations. You certainly wouldn’t want your clients knowing too much about you.

Heat doesn’t help. I’ve just had some dinner and watched some TV. Are you up to much this evening?

@creative_writer aye true, perhaps she's more the sort you might spend time with as more of a learning/exchanging of ideas? As in like, how would she react (and would you be interested in, also important lol) to you asking like, 'Hey I saw some of your posts about your mental health, I wanted to just see how that went, because I have been trying to work on being open myself.'

Yeah finding your people is a big one!! When you do find em, I think you'll know 😊

Bout the same lol. Been hiding in the air con all day. I imagine the constant change from cool to hot as you move between air conditioned building would also be gnarly for ya poor brain!

Much on tomorrow?

@Jynx maybe when I see her next, but I don’t know when that will happen. I don’t have her on socials either or follow her account. My mum is the one who has showed me videos of her. I think both her and her husband have depression. I do know my parents wouldn’t discuss my MH with relatives, gossip culture is real, even among relatives. Part of it is a marriage thing too.

I don’t have air con in my room, but my parents room does.

I have more work to do on my assignment. What about you, what are you doing tomorrow?

@creative_writer yeah I grew up in a small town, everyone knew who my parents were so like... I totally get the gossip thing! I think it legitimately altered the way my parents ever engaged with their kids' mental health stuff.... like it's always 'keep it hush hush how bad things are!' and 'Don't mention these things at the dinner party tonight!' And so you know, we kinda grew up with the message that your pain must be hidden, and how dare you make another person uncomfortable by not being 100% okay all the time... it's BS hey.

Oh yikes, how do you survive the summer? I imagine a family sleepover in the parent's room is way too awkward ahaha

Tomorrow probs just pottering about doing some house stuff, maybe some art stuff. Probably make a big mess somewhere hehehe

@Jynx internalised pain grows with time. They were probably told to sweep their emotions under the rug.

No I don’t sleepover, I prefer my bedroom. I’ll use the fan, doesn’t alway cut it, but it’s better than nothing.

What kind of art are you into?

@creative_writer aye, that old saying, 'What we resist, persists.'

Yeah I figured lol. Wet face towel!! That was my trick growing up without air con - use the wet face towel in combo with the fan, it's the best.

Mostly just doing bits and bobs for decor around the house!! I can show off the lampshade I made, and I'm also figuring out what to put in the centre of this plaque/jawbone piece... maybe a crystal I think!

You had any time for some creative endeavours? I imagine all your creative energy is being poured into uni atm hey!!

I should probably say goodnight!! I think a cool change comes tomorrow so hopefully that will mean an easier day for you tomorrow 🤞

Nighty night poppet!! 💜

@Jynx that is true. They do say if you try not to think about a pink elephant, the more you do.

Those decorations look amazing. A crystal would look lovely. Then again, I love shiny things.

I haven't tried wet towels before, but might give it a go. Also the clothing you wear can also make a huge difference, I am a far of loose bamboo loungewear. It's less sweaty than cotton and less likely to smell. I am very sensitive to the smell of sweat.

My creative energy has been directed to my final assignment. It consists of a presentation and written piece. I enjoy designing slides.

I hope you slept well last night 💜. I did not sleep well last night, so my brain is a bit all over the place. Lack of sleep or no sleep= excess energy and racing thoughts. Which is a problem if it coincides with low mood. I'm tired and wired today. I just hope it does not escalate to suicidality because that's the last thing I need while completing my final assignment

@creative_writer yeah I thought a crystal too! Just a matter of finding the right size/shape, and a way to affix it.... hmmmmm

I too like shiny things 😍😂 Been called a magpie before cos I'm always coming home with random bits and bobs I've found 😋

OMG you too haha designing slides is fun as! I think there's definitely been an assignment or two where I spent more time on the layout and making it pretty than on the assignment itself 😂

How did you end up going yesterday? I hope you got more sleep last night!!

@Jynx being creative is a talent that you definitely have 😊

I slept better last night. I submitted my final assignment. Feeling relieved but also exhausted and sort of cranky in a way. Then again, I do have a migraine right now