Same old

Thank you @Faith-and-Hope

@Former-Member what she said was what i was feeling and couldnt think well enough to write!

I'm just so tired i can not think straight at the moment. you would think that this level of tiredness would mean i would sleep. im just hoping that psychiatrist will have a suggestion/med that i can use to help me function and work. but also terrified to go and see him (thurs) as low as i've been. and discussing everything thats happened..

❤️💕 @Former-Member ....

Breathe .... 🐠🐠🐠❣

@Former-Member

You and your little man have been through a lot, no wonder you are feeling exhausted and fed up.

You need to get some sleep, I too was like you on the weekend after our ordeal with my partners sister. I couldnt think, I was bumping into things, tripping over my feet and actually feeling ill. I think on Friday I slept for about 12 hours, then crashed out early and slept for another 12 hours. Sleep is our medicine when we are like this, the brain needs to recharge itself and for us every emotional issue we get takes it out of us a hell of alot more than others.

Dont be so hard onyourself!

Thanks @Change123

Sleep would be good, 12 hours! that would be a miracle in my world.. i'd settle for 5.. unbroken if possible. im scared today. anxious and on edge. just want to run away from everything that is on today, actually just want to run away from my whole world/life.

lil boy is still getting tired easily, but recovering ok. He doesnt feel much pain (possibly because of ASD) and so keeping him from doing too much is hard. kids have had cabin fever as well from not doing much while hes getting better.

Hi @Former-Member

So VERY Glad you are still keeping on .. at life .. the children and yes the forum.

I think I am going to use the idea in my self talk .. when in hell .. keep going

You know that I was in hell .. people dont realise the toll that takes on sleep and the ability to turn on off from hypervigilance.

it is not just training in helpful routines it is physiological as well.

and some of it is just waiting it out ..

you have necessary toughness ... to do it

and the tenderness.,

Glad to be back. Had a great time and its good to report that this time I stayed away from my brother's family and my neck did not go out .. even though I spent 24 hours in a row on trains .. I do know how to manage myself.

You will find ways to survive and thive. You are probably being realistic in saying it wont change soon.

hi @Appleblossom

its so so so nice to see you again. i'm so glad your neck was ok for the trip and that you were able to manage yourself so well! was it fun? fulfilling? a good break/refreshing?

I have had a not so great day. but so glad to see you

Sorry you had a hard day today @Former-Member

It must have been refreshing as I walked home from the station with my luggage yesterday .. when it was close to 36 .. I was sweating .. but felt cleansed, energised and mentally reefreshed!

Chose not to react to the sprawling dish decoration my son had arranged arranged the taps and sink .. and listened and focussed on him.

Last year my neck went out twice .. I did the same 2 events but travelled by plane to Nth NSW and drove up to the second event in NE Victoria.

but neither of the triggers were present .. (aggressive persons & vibrations) I had a few embarrassing and self doubting moments .. needed to work on my self talk a bit .. overall .. it was a great holiday .. train travel is so relaxing .. tho one connection was flubbed cos of late train ...

99.99% of people interactions were positive .. I developed thoughts that I looked really weird or my speech was off .. or myfacial expressions were weird .. cos of the way I had been treated in the family .. now .. I figure that the random factor has a place in my healing .. if most people just act normally around me .. then maybe I am kinda .. norrrrrmaaall ??

whereas in my family (and sometimes in groups) I feel I have to come up with the bright ideas, pay the bills, do the work but still get put down ... by someone who is used to getting their own way

I did need a break from that... my boy is growing up and more aware .. and making efforts to be positive and respectful .. and pull his weight

Hi @Appleblossom so nice to see you back here

@Former-Memberthinking of you tonight, sending you a big hug

thanks @BlueBay

so much to be doing tonight for work.. breathe!